Last night I went to see the Jewish musical star Pink in concert. I bought tickets a long time ago and heard that she was a tremendous performer. I like her music, although I’m far from a rabid fan. With Sheryl Crow opening, I was excited for the show.
Sheryl Crow was awesome. She brought me back in time with her classic songs and while the show was in a stadium, I wish she was in a smokey crowded bar where you could really feel and appreciate her music. I enjoyed her performance as it brought me back to simpler times.
Then it was time for the main event. Pink was electric from the very beginning. Her energy and joy filled the stadium with positivity. Since October 7th, over a year ago, I’ve had a hard time truly letting go and embracing joy. Last night, Pink unlocked that for me. What a performer. She exuded happiness. Love flew from every song and every time she talked to us. Her very first song set the tone – watch and listen as she bounces with joy and flies effortlessly.
Her flying early in the show was beautiful. The music was great and she added elegance and beauty. The past 12 plus months have been filled with so much ugliness. October 7th and those images never leave me. I’m glad that I saw the Hamas 47 minute video but it altered who I am. I am glad that I have been to the Nova site twice, heard from survivors, and those involved with rescuing people that day, but the horror is now a part of me. I’m glad that I went to Kfar Aza twice, heard the stories from the IDF and from somebody who was there that day and recently returned to their home. I’m glad that I saw what the Hamas terrorists did but those images are burned into my soul. Last night, as she performed, it was the first time since October 7th that the only thing in my mind, heart, and soul was beauty and love.
Her cover of Pat Benatar’s “Heartbreaker” got us up, singing and dancing. I was transformed to the early 80s and my high school days. To simpler times. A time when hate didn’t dominate the world. When we didn’t see daily antisemitism and Jew hatred. Violence against Jews wasn’t happening on the streets of Amsterdam, Paris, New York, Chicago, and so many other places. I thought of my diverse group of friends from that time – we didn’t think about identity politics or our differences – we focused on the people we liked. So many of them are still friends today. Jewish, Christian, Mormon, Black, White, Gay, and Straight. We played sports together, went to parties together, hung out on the streets together, went to concerts together, and got in trouble together. I miss the simpleness of those times. The moral clarity that existed for us in high school and then college. Enjoy the song and performance, I sure did.
I wish that I recorded Pink as she talked to, and about, her mother and their relationship. Her mom was in the front row and it was a classic Jewish mother moment. We all laughed but I think those of us who have Jewish mothers laughed a little deeper as she talked about her mom telling her what to do and then watching her mom actually do it from the audience and Pink listening to her and then begging her to stop. When she talked about her late father, it hit home deeply for me. It brought me right back to my dad and the relationship we had. It made me sad and joyous at the same time. While I don’t know her, never met her, and have no personal relationship, I know we bonded over the loss of our fathers. Then she brought her daughter on stage to sing part of a song with her. What a highlight. I enjoyed watching Pink’s face more than anything else as she listened and watched her daughter Willow sing. As a father, there is nothing better than seeing my children succeed. Their joy and success is so much better and more powerful than my own. I could see that on Pink’s face and it reinforced my committment to do whatever I can to make this world a better place for my children and eventual grandchildren. There is no excuse for us to sit back and not do the work. Not put in the effort. We are not responsible for the outcome but we are each responsible for doing the work. That’s a summary from Pirkei Avot, the Ethics of our Fathers. It shows that anybody can learn and even teach a little Torah.
The show ended with an incredible encore where Pink literally flies across the stadium. The freedom in the song and as she flies is so clear. It’s a reminder that we control how we feel. We control whether we want to be tied down, locked up, bitter and angry, or if we want to be free, flying through the air, looking for the beauty and enjoying what the world offers. It takes effort to do it, but the power to live meaningful and beautiful lives is entirely in our own hands. The question is are you willing to do the work? Watch Pink fly and sing – see and feel the freedom. As the movie version of Wicked is about to be released, watch Pink defy gravity. Sorry I lose her for a bit but you get to see the audience during that time and feel the energy.
Pink inspired me last night It shows that you don’t have to truly be a torah scholar to inspire people with Torah values. It also shows how learning some Torah can help you see Jewish wisdom in every day life.
My friend Yocheved Ruttenberg is another real example of this. Founder of the Sword of Iron Facebook group with 40,000 members all interested in volunteering in Israel, her story as a 23 year old changing the world is inspiring. She recently won the Z3 Bridge Builder award. Her speech highlights her story and what she has done and what she is doing. It is inspiring.
The joy Yocheved brings to the 40,000 members of Sword of Iron is incredible. I read the posts of people volunteering in Israel and sharing their pictures doing it. I read about all the amazing volunteer opportunities and am astounded and inspired. It makes me wish I was independently wealthy and could just go and volunteer full time in Israel. From picking fruits and vegetables to helping rebuild in the south. Preparing BBQs for IDF soldiers to making tzizit for them. Helping those in need in every aspect of society. All done with gratitude. All done with grace. All done from the heart. All for our Jewish brothers and sisters who are fighting for the survival of the Jewish people. If you really want to experience the joy of Yocheved and her work, watch this Shabbat Shalom video. I can’t get enough of it. I dare you to only watch it once. It’s infectious.
There are so many ways to change the world and the world needs changing. You can do it through music. You can do it with volunteering. You can do it by helping others. A friend of mine who made aliyah years ago reached out today. He and his family will be in the United States to get away for a much needed respite in December. They will be in Florida for part of their trip and like my family, love sports and wanted to go to the Orlando Magic game for Jewish Heritage Night. They were having trouble getting tickets and asked for my help. Quickly, I was able to secure tickets for him in the block at an affordable price. I then reached out to a friend to see if they can help with some VIP experiences for their children. After the year that they have experienced, the least I can do is try to help them have some peace and joy. Just like Pink gave me last night, I can help them have a few moments of joy where they aren’t worried about sirens, they aren’t worried about rockets, they aren’t worried about friends in the IDF and if they are alive or not. They can be kids, enjoying a basketball game and maybe getting some special access. It didn’t take much for me to help. A little research. A few text messages. It did take effort but not much. Often times we don’t realize how easy it can be to make a difference in the lives of others. How we can give a little bit of life and levity to those in need.
I work with Dror Israel, and amazing organization that helps children with schools, youth groups, and summer camps. Their ZIONIST youth movement is in all the Druze villages and in 55 Arab villages with more than 20,000 Arabs involved. They do amazing work. In this same context, they are creating restorative trips for children and families to get away from areas with sirens, to go to Mitzpe Ramon (Israel’s version of the Grand Canyon). This short video highlights what they do and what the effect and impact is. They are changing the lives of these children and families and changing the world.
We have the ability to change the world with our own actions. Pink gave me a few hours of pure joy like I haven’t had since October 7th. Here is the question I pose to you. What are you going to do to find your joy. To find your stress relief? And what are you going to do to help others who are in need and can’t do it themselves? We all have that responsibility. It is Kol Yisrael Arevim zeh Bazeh(All of Israel is responsible for each other). Jewish or not, we can be inspired by this lesson. Each of us can change the world, one person at a time, one action at a time.
Let’s all choose to be like Pink, who electrified and inspired 75,000 people last night. Who sent a message of love, inclusion, support, family, and values. The movie The Waterboy puts it best. You can do it!
It’s always interesting learning Jewish things in Israel, especially in Jerusalem. Aryeh Ben David explored Chapter 3 of the beginning of the Torah with us. We talked about Adam and Eve being expelled from the Garden of Eden. The midrash (story from Rabbi’s) is that after being forbidden by God to eat from the tree of knowledge, it took them about 20 minutes to eat the apple. It is about temptation.
So why would God tempt Adam and Eve, knowing that they would fail the test and be expelled from the Garden of Eden? How do we do when told we can’t do something, especially something that sounds interesting, fun or would be totally awesome? A friend parks their Lamborghini in your driveway, gives you the keys, tells you they will be back in a month and that you CANNOT drive it. How long would it take before the temptation to just take it for a little spin would win out? He won’t know – it’s just a couple of miles. Temptation is all around us and our goal is to do the best we can to not fall into it.
It is easy to fall into temptation. We do it every day. Too much food. Delicious desserts. Some people it’s with sexual activity. Alcohol. Drugs. Buying expensive things that we can’t really afford. Temptation feels good. It’s immediate gratification. The consequences happen down the road and we don’t think about them when we are in the middle of enjoying the fruits of temptation. Adam and Eve didn’t think about what God would do if they ate the fruit they were told not to. The consequences came after.
How do we avoid temptation? What can we do to be more aware? That’s where structure comes in. That’s where gratitude comes in. Adam and Eve had everything, yet they still couldn’t appreciate what they had and risked everything because of temptation. The desire for more. They lost. Often times we do the same. We risk everything. Our health by eating too much, the wrong type of foods, or too many sweets. Our lives with drugs or alcohol. Our marriage and families with sexual desires and behavior. Sometimes we see the consequences and they are devastating, like Adam and Eve. Sometimes we get away with them, which only reinforces the behavior. It is like Las Vegas, and we are gambling with our lives. Just like in Vegas, we forget that the house ALWAYS WINS.
The second lesson we learned from Adam and Eve was to dream. It sounds strange to think of that since the story doesn’t seem to focus on dreams at all. Nobody ever told me that having dreams was part of Adam and Eve’s story. It was about obeying God and the consequences when you don’t. It was about being created in the image of God. But dreaming?
After being kicked out of the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve dreamed of finding a way back. When they realized they could never get back, they began to dream about how to make the world they now lived in as perfect as they could to resemble the Garden of Eden. That is the beginning of the Jewish value of Tikkun Olam, repairing the world. Adam and Eve tasted the perfect world and lost it. They, and their ancestors for thousands of years, would spend their time trying to recreate it.
Each of us has the ability to make the world a little more perfect. It’s not our job to make the whole world perfect. That’s too much for any of us. However, we do have the ability to do little things to make the world better. That’s the essence of the story of Adam and Eve. It’s not about how the snake convinced Eve or how Eve tempted Adam. It’s not about how God took Adam’s rib to make Eve. It’s about each of us doing our part to make the world a little bit more like the Garden of Eden.
It can sound overwhelming but it’s not. It is the little things. At our hotel in Jerusalem, I say hi and good morning to all of the people who work here. The man who cleans my room is a nice guy, we talk throughout the day when I see him. Instead of thinking of him as less than or pretending not to see him, I recognize him and treat him nicely. He does the same to me. Treating everybody as an equal human being makes the world a better place. That’s an easy thing for us all to do if we simply pay attention and make the effort.
Adam and Eve had a big dream to make the world resemble the Garden of Eden. Bigger dreams have bigger impacts. We know one thing for sure, we cannot achieve a dream that we don’t have. Dreamers in today’s world often get shut down. There are too many challenges, too many risks to dream. Yet it is dreamers who change the world. Steve Jobs used to dream about making devices that you didn’t even know you needed. The iPhone. The iPad. I remember the Thanksgiving discussion with my grandfather and my father about desktop computers. My grandfather was 100% certain that there was no way that every house would want, need, afford, or have a computer. In the end, he was right. In my house we don’t have one computer. We have 6 or 7 computers (including laptops) and that doesn’t include iPads, iPhones, Apple Watches, etc. Steve Jobs’ dream changed the world.
It isn’t just Steve Jobs though. I remember a few years ago reading about a man named Rodney Smith Jr. I’m sure you have all heard of him. What? You haven’t? Rodney Smith Jr. came up with an amazing idea. He wanted to raise boys into men, girls into women AND help those in need. How does he do this? He created a nonprofit called Raising Men and Women Lawn Care Service that encourages them to take the 50-yard challenge. They are challenged to cut 50 lawns FREE for the elderly, disabled, single parents, veterans, & anyone in need of help in your town. At each level of 10 they receive a new t-shirt of a different color and when they reach 50 lawns, the come to visit the boy or girl and present them both their black shirt to mark 50 lawns and give them a brand-new lawn mower, weed eater & blower! How cool is that? They are now in all 50 states, 8 countries, and have thousands of kids mowing lawns for people who need help. In the winter, they shovel snow, and, in the fall, they rake leaves. They are truly making a difference in the world. Rodney Smith Jr. has made the world better for the thousands of children who are giving back, for their parents, and for the tens of thousands of people who get their services.
Steve Jobs had another important quote for this context. He said, “We’re here to put a dent in the universe. Otherwise, why else even be here?” Each of us has the ability to put a dent in the universe. As it says in Pirkei Avot (Ethics of our Fathers), Chapter 2:16; “(Rabbi Tarfon) used to say… It is not up to you to finish the task, but you are not free to avoid it.” Our job is to participate in the job that Adam and Eve started. Making the world as close to the Garden of Eden as possible. What are you going to do today to make the world a better place? What are your random acts of kindness going to be? What impact will you make today. We all have the opportunity to change the world a little bit every day. The questions is are you going to do your part?
I have written extensively about how behind the times I am when it comes to music. I recently discovered the 2001 song by Alan Jackson, Where were you? (when the world stopped turnin’). He wrote it about September 11, 2001 not long afterwards and performed it only 10 days later at the Country Music Awards (CMAs). I find it very impactful, not just as it reminds me of what I felt and was going through after 9/11 but also what I felt like on October 7th and continue to feel today.
Jackson said that he had strong feelings and wanted to write something that expressed them without being political or partisan. He wanted it to clearly reflect his thoughts and feelings. This song accomplished that in an incredible manner. Since October 7th, I have been writing to try to do the same. When I heard this song and when I listened deeply to the lyrics, they not only speak about September 11th and the feelings afterwards but easily could reflect October 7th and afterwards. Many Israeli artists have written songs about October 7th and after but I haven’t heard or seen a single American songwriter or singer with the exception of Bono and U2 changing the words of the song Pride: In the Name of Love to reflect October 7th instead of April 4 and the Supernova music festival. You can see and hear the pain Bono is feeling. I remember being incredibly moved when I heard it for the first time and even today, as I listen to it, it brings tears to my eyes. I wish they would re-release it with altered lyrics.
Where were you when the world stopped turnin’ That September day? Were you in the yard with your wife and children Or workin’ on some stage in L.A.?
Most people know where they were on September 11, 2001 as it is part of our American psyche. I know where I was. Who I was talking to. What TV station I was watching. Where I was when the first tower fell. Where I was when the 2nd tower fell. Keeping in touch with my brother, who worked in NYC at that time, to check on his safety. Being grateful that my dad wasn’t flying that day – he had flown the day before. Running a Hillel meant I had students to attend to and their needs. The pain everybody felt was palpable. September 11th and days that followed were filled with hugs, tears, conversations, and questions.
October 7th was very similar for me. I remember exactly where I was, where I sat, what TV stations I watched, and who I was with. I remember sending WhatsApp messages to friends and family in Israel to check on them. The uncertainty of where the attacks were going to occur that day. Was it just going to be near the Gaza envelope? Were they going to be attacked from the north and Lebanon? What was the PA going to do and would we see terrorists coming in from the East as well?
There are moments in our lives that we never forget the details. My wedding. The birth of my children. Family simchas. The last day I spent with my father before he died. Three Mile Island (I lived nearby in Harrisburg at the time). The assassination attempt on Ronald Reagan. John Lennon and Yitzhak Rabin being assassinated. 9/11. October 7th. In one way or another, the world stopped turning on all of those days. Some due to joy, some due to sadness. How the world stopping turning impacted us and what we do with the changes that result is what’s key.
Did you stand there in shock at the sight of that black smoke Risin’ against that blue sky? Did you shout out in anger, in fear for your neighbor Or did you just sit down and cry?
On 9/11, when the first plane hit the first tower, I remember thinking it was an accident. We watched in horror but didn’t realize we were under attack. It wasn’t until the second plane hit the second tower that the shock really hit. Where was going to be next? My brother worked in NYC and his building was attached to Grand Central Station. Was that the next target? My dad was supposed to fly that week and his flight was changed. I tried to remember when it was changed. Was it changed so that he was flying that day? Was it the day before? Was it the day after? What about my friends who worked and lived in NY? Then the plane was crashed into Shanksville, PA and then into the Pentagon. Were there going to be more attacks? If so, where? How?
On October 7th, I sat there in shock. I couldn’t believe what I was watching and hearing. As I communicated with friends and family in Israel, it didn’t get any better. I shouted in anger, in fear for my friends and family. I sat in shock at what I watched and as names were released, prayed that I didn’t know any of them and was also sad that these people, these members of my Jewish family, were killed or taken hostage.
I couldn’t move from my chair in front of the television. I couldn’t change the channel. I didn’t want to talk to anybody as I had nothing to say. It was so unbelievable. When I did talk, it was usually filled with anger at what happened, not understanding where the IDF was. Not understanding how this was continuing as long as it was. Not understanding how it even happened. The more that was reported, the angrier I got at Hamas for doing it and for the Israeli government for missing the signs and for allowing it to happen. I got angry at the Gazan people who were welcomed into the kibbutzim for work and ate dinner with the families that they sold out to Hamas, ensuring their death or kidnapping.
We all have our own way of dealing with this type of trauma. Jackson’s point is that whatever we did, however we dealt with it, is what we needed. He isn’t saying one is better than the other. He isn’t saying if you didn’t do it his way, you were wrong. It’s a recognition that however we dealt with 9/11 or with October 7th, it’s what we needed to do in the moment. And that’s good enough.
Did you weep for the children, they lost their dear loved ones Pray for the ones who don’t know? Did you rejoice for the people who walked from the rubble And sob for the ones left below?
On 9/11 it was common to weep for everybody. Those who were killed. Those who we didn’t know what happened. The families of both. We prayed for the yet to be born children who lost their father on 9/11. And the children who lost one or both parents. We celebrated those who managed to escape and to live. And mourned those who didn’t. We found heroes in the passengers that crashed the plane in Shanksville, PA instead of letting the terrorists crash it into what they wanted, which would have killed more people.
October 7th seems to be viewed differently by many. I recently saw the documentary about the SuperNova music festival. These young people who were there to celebrate music were massacred by evil terrorists. I saw the Hamas video which showed them celebrating the murder of civilians – the elderly, women, children, and adults. Kfir Babis was taken hostage at less than a year old and his brother at 4 years old are forgotten by most of the world. The American hostages have been forgotten by Americans and by our leaders. In Israel, there is an uprising against the government for how they are handling the hostage crisis. Families have been displaced for more than 5 months, both from the Gaza envelope and from the north, where Hezbollah is sending rockets every day into Israel.
The trauma of Israelis is forgotten. The trauma of the diaspora Jews is ignored. The world weeps for the children of Gaza who are dying because of Hamas but ignores the children of Israel who died because of Hamas. The Red Cross still hasn’t visited the hostages, 177 days later. They haven’t received their medication in 177 days. As the father of a child with Type 1 diabetes, I know what would happen if he went 177 days without insulin. After 9/11, America stood together in support of those impacted and those who lost loved ones. We stood together against evil. When it comes to October 7th, that stand only lasted a few days before they became held responsible for their own victimization by evil. It disgusts me. When I listen to Alan Jackson sing these words, I find myself burning inside, wondering why it doesn’t apply to Jews. Why does everybody else matter but we don’t. How can people who supposedly stand for morals, ethics, justice, equality, and the like actually show how fraudulent they are and not be held accountable.
My heart breaks daily for the families of the current hostages. It aches every day for the hostages that were released and their families, for what they must go through. It hurts for the families of the victims and the survivors of the SuperNova music festival massacre. I have a deep hole in my heart and my soul for everybody impacted by October 7th – the Jews, Bedouins, Arab-Israelis, Druze, Bhai’I, and the innocent Palestinians and people of Gaza (because there is a difference between the terrorists and the people). I wish the world mourned with me and stood up against evil. This verse reminds me that no matter how much we want to think that we can just fit in with society, we are always Jews first and the world will always look at us differently. They will weep and cry out for anybody other than us. They will mourn and fight for the rights of everybody other than us. We are the only ones who will stand up for ourselves.
The great Israeli leader Golda Meir had a number of quotes that reflects this reality. They include:
Did you burst out with pride for the red, white, and blue And the heroes who died just doin’ what they do? Did you look up to heaven for some kind of answer And look at yourself and what really matters?
After 9/11, American pride was as high as I have seen since the 1980 US Olympic Hockey team beat the Soviets and then won the gold medal. We were united as Americans. Nobody was going to stop us. We were going to kill the terrorists, restore democracy, rule the world. Our first responders were all heroes. I remember the flag from the Twin Towers being flown at Yankee Stadium. We begin singing ‘God Bless America’ in the 7th inning of baseball games. We thanked our soldiers for their service.
The flag from ground zero flying at Yankee Stadium in 2001
We looked to God for answers. As a Hillel Director, it was an incredible time as students flocked to ask existential questions. Nobody was afraid to ask a question and seem uneducated because everybody was asking questions. People reassessed their lives, their values. Seeing these widows and orphans, pregnant women who lost their husbands, hearing the recording from the planes, inspired us all to be better people. “Let’sRoll”, said by Todd Beamer, before he and the other passengers on Flight 93 attacked the cockpit and the terrorists, crashing the plane into a field before it could be used as a weapon, was an inspiration to us all. We asked ourselves what we would do, what could we do, if we were in a similar situation.
October 7th was different for the world. As Jews, as Zionists, we asked where was the IDF. We were united in our grief, not in our dominance. We knew that Israel would respond, that war was here, and that Gaza would be devastated, but we took no pride in that. We took no joy. We wanted our hostages back. We wanted our country back. We wanted to dream of peace back. We sang Hatikvah, ‘Hope’, the Israeli national anthem with hope for the safe return of the hostages, safety for the IDF soldiers who were going to war, hope that peace would come quickly. The heroes we saw were ordinary people who raced into danger to help others.
Bedouins like Ismail Al-Karnawi, who left Rahat with three other family members to head towards Kibbutz Be’eri in order to rescue residents from the inferno. Sari Al-Karnawi, who served as a police officer at the Nova party and rescued partygoers from the attack. Muhammad Abu Najah, an employee of the cleaning company at Nova, who fought against the terrorists, called first responders, and warned others of the presence of terrorists. Omar Abu Sabeelah, who in Sderot heard a woman’s scream and saw Odaya Suissa with her two daughters, aged 6 and 3, and her husband Dolev who was shot dead by the terrorists. Despite being wounded, Sabeelah managed to reach the girls in the car and get them out to safety. He later died from his injuries. Yousef Alziyadneh, who saved the lives of approximately 30 Nova party revelers who were under fire. Anis Abu Dabbus, a senior paramedic crew at the Rahat Magen David Adom station, who acted with his crew in the Rahat and Ofakim area, treating the wounded and providing lifesaving treatment to many.
Heroes like retired general Noam Tibon, who got in his car with his wife and headed towards Kibbutz Nahal Oz, where his son, daughter-in-law, and two young granddaughters were hiding in their safe room as the Kibbutz was attacked and overtaken by Hamas terrorists. Tibon encountered a battle between IDF soldiers and Hamas and picked up a weapon and helped defeat the terrorists. He took 2 of the wounded soldiers to his wife who drove them to the hospital for treatment while he continued on foot until being picked up by another retired general who was answering the call and taken to the Kibbutz. 60 Minutes did a story on his heroism.
Countless other heroes like my friend Yaron Buskila, who left his house without a weapon to fight the terrorists and save lives. Yaron shared a little of what it was like and that little bit that he shared showed me not just his bravery, but the bravery of so many Israelis; Jewish, Bedouin, Arab, and Christian on October 7th.
On October 7th we all looked to heaven for an answer. An answer that will never come. Instead, we began to question ourselves about what really matters. What is important to us and how do we show that. How do we reprioritize our lives around the things that matter instead of the things we thought mattered before October 7th. It’s amazing to have lived in the post 9/11 world and the post October 7th world. Two terrorist attacks. Two tragedies. Two horrible things. Two very different outcomes and feelings.
I’m just a singer of simple songs I’m not a real political man I watch CNN, but I’m not sure I can tell you The diff’rence in Iraq and Iran
I find this to be one of the most profound lines in the song. So many of us don’t know what’s really going on. We didn’t know who the Taliban was before 9/11. We couldn’t tell you the difference between the Shiite country of Iran and the Sunni country of Iraq other than their rulers.
The same holds true after October 7th but it’s even worse. People don’t only know what Hamas and Hezbollah are, they don’t know that Gaza hasn’t been ‘occupied’ since 2005. They use phrases like “From the River to the Sea” and don’t know what river or what sea they are talking about. They use words like Apartheid and Genocide because they sound good and are powerful without understand the facts or definition of those words. They talk about the high number of civilians that have been killed, not understanding that war is terrible and civilians are killed, but that Israel is nearly 9 times better than the norm in minimizing civilan deaths. Instead of addressing the evil of Hamas, people are feeding into ancient Jewish tropes and feeding global antisemitism.
Israel-Hamas figures compared to the normal rates in war
I am concerned that this ignorance, this hate, will result in catastrophic events happening in the United States as we blame the victim and both encourage and allow the evil to grow.
But I know Jesus and I talk to God And I remember this from when I was young Faith, hope, and love are some good things He gave us And the greatest is love
One of my favorite things about Judaism is the way we look to God, to the Torah, for answers. There are always lessons to learn. Since October 7th I have spent much more time asking questions, learning Torah with Rabbis, and working to understand my role as a Jew in this world.
There is a line in Pirkei Avot, the lessons of our fathers, that always speaks to me. It comes from 2:16 and says that Rabbi Tarfon used to say, “It is not your duty to finish the work, but neither are you at liberty to neglect it.” After October 7th this hit home in a very different way. I am not a soldier and can’t fight with the IDF. I am not an Israeli citizen. I do not have the duty to finish the work of the war. However, I am also not able to just neglect the situation and not do my part. There are many ways to do my part and I have learned that there is much I can do. We all have roles to play and our responsibility is not to do everything but rather to play our part, to do what we can. Speak out. Get educated. Encourage others to learn and not just repeat things they hear.
We can also work to live with faith, hope, and love. This doesn’t mean excuse the behavior of the terrorists or those who repeat the lies because they don’t know better. We can have faith that Israel will defeat evil. We can have faith in God and the IDF. And we can focus on love. Love of the Jewish people. Love of our mishpacha (family). Love of Israel. Love of our family. Love of the teachings of the Torah (which if you know me doesn’t sound like something I would say.)
In these terrible times, in these times of desperation, we can still live with faith, hope, and love. We can choose to look to the future with positivity or negativity. We can do our part to make the world a beautiful, better place or we can allow it to die. The choice is ours.
Where were you when the world stopped turnin’ That September day? Teachin’ a class full of innocent children Or drivin’ down some cold interstate?
Did you feel guilty ’cause you’re a survivor? In a crowded room did you feel alone? Did you call up your mother and tell her you love her? Did you dust off that Bible at home?
This verse reminds us that the world did stop turning on both 9/11 and on October 7th. We don’t have to pretend that it didn’t. President Bush was reading to a class full of innocent children. We were all doing something when it happened, when we got the news.
President Bush reading to children as terrorists attacked on 9/11
We don’t have to live with survivors’ guilt. I wasn’t living in NY on 9/11 or in Israel on October 7th. Why would I have survivors’ guilt? Because I know people who were. I know people who lost loved ones. My life was altered only in the inconveniences I had to deal with after 9/11. October 7th meant that I didn’t get to go to Israel in November like I had planned. Yet the survivors’ guilt is real because I am part of a community. While I am an American, Israel is my homeland. I have a strong tie to Israel and my homeland, my love, was critically injured and damaged on October 7th. That is where my survivors’ guilt comes from. Because I haven’t been able to go to Israel since October 7th.
There are plenty of times when I do feel alone. People chanting antisemitic tropes. Dressing in Nazi uniforms and flying Nazi flags. When I see friends posting hateful comments that they don’t even necessarily understand are hateful and hurtful. I have learned who my friends really are and who aren’t. This can be painful but it’s also refreshing because I don’t have to include those people in my life any longer.
After 9/11 I made sure to talk to my parents, my siblings, and my loved ones. It was a reminder of how short life is. The same thing happened after October 7th. This type of brutality and horror reminds us how precious life is. How limited our time really is. What and who is really important to us. Last week I reached out to my friends who are Palestinian and live in that area. I wanted to see how they are doing. I wanted to let them know I was thinking of them. I wanted to let them know I consider them my friend no matter what is happening in the world. And that I want to see them when I get to Israel in the near future because they matter. I choose to live in faith, hope, and love, not in hate.
After 9/11 people began asking questions about God and opened a door that had been closed for them. October 7th was the same. The opportunity to study, to learn, to ask questions, and to explore Judaism, God, and spirituality was there and many of us took it. It opened me up to learning more, to being a better person, and to ask why I behave certain ways and is that reflective of the person I want to be. We have an opportunity to do better and to be better. I am taking that opportunity.
Did you open your eyes and hope it never happened Close your eyes and not go to sleep? Did you notice the sunset for the first time in ages And speak to some stranger on the street? Did you lay down at night and think of tomorrow Go out and buy you a gun?
After 9/11 I know a lot of people who did close their eyes and hope it never happened. People who struggled with sleep. I wasn’t one of them. But after October 7th, I was. I hoped it was a nightmare. I hoped I would wake up and it was only a nightmare. I struggled to sleep and when I did sleep, it wasn’t restful. October 7th was much more personal for me than 9/11. Unfortunately, I think most of the country has forgotten the horror of 9/11 and October 7th happened ‘over there’ and ‘to them’ and doesn’t affect their daily lives.
I have chosen to invest more in random acts of kindness. Today I was at the grocery store behind a couple with a child that has a disability. It meant that they were going very slow. I was stuck behind them. Instead of getting frustrated and trying to push by, I took a deep breath and watched them with their daughter. And found joy in it. Instead of being angry and resentful, I was grateful and filled with love. All because I took a deep breath and didn’t push past them. I say hello to strangers and talk with them as people, not strangers. I will hold a door open, let somebody get in front of me, and enjoy the beauty of the day.
The world is a scary place and has only gotten scarier since October 7th. Being so public as a Jewish leader, I felt targeted and at risk. Long before October 7th, I did get training on firearms and made sure that I have them to protect myself. They are things I hope to only use on the range when I practice. But I won’t be a victim. I won’t allow my family to be at risk from the hatred that exists in the world. And I know I am not alone in these thoughts, concerns, and actions.
Did you turn off that violent old movie you’re watchin’ And turn on I Love Lucy reruns? Did you go to a church and hold hands with some strangers Stand in line to give your own blood? Did you just stay home and cling tight to your family Thank God you had somebody to love?
This last verse asks what we are doing differently. While there are specific things listed, it’s really about who you are and what you are doing as a result of 9/11 and now October 7th. There are many things I do differently today than I did prior to October 7th. I speak out much more often against antisemitism and hatred. I reach out to those I love and to my friends. I make sure my friends who are different religions, races, cultures, etc. know I care about them and that I am interested in our similarities, not our differences.
Like Pirkei Avot teaches us, I have an obligation to help with the work. So I give blood, hold doors, exhibit patience, spend more time with my family, tell those that I love that I love them. I invest in friendships and allow those that have been shown to not be investable to die so that I am investing in those of value.
I appreciate what I have in my life. I am a rich man because I want what I have rather than having what I want. I am grateful for the life that I get to live rather than worrying about the life I wish I had. I am more connected spiritually and am open to all that the universe brings to me.
I am committed to making the world a better place. That starts with those around me and in my local community. It means doing things for the right reasons. President Ronald Reagan had on his desk a sign that said, “There is no limit to what a man can do or where he can go if he doesn’t mind who gets the credit.” That is how I live my life post October 7th. I don’t care who gets the credit. I don’t care about the recognition. I only care about what we can do together. What we can accomplish. How we can make the world a better place for all.
The paperweight from President Ronald Reagan’s desk
Where were you when the world stopped turnin’ On that September day?
The song ends with the haunting question that it began with. It reminds us that the world did stop turning. Both on 9/11 and October 7th the world was forever altered. We were forever altered. Where were we? What did we do as a result? How did we change? How did we change the world? What did we do to make the world a better place and to get it turning once again.
At the end of the day, all we can control is our own actions. What are you going to do today to make the world a better place? How are you going to change the world today? Remember that just because the world stopped turning on October 7th doesn’t mean we are free from the obligation to make sure it is turning once again. I’m up for the challenge and I hope you will join me.
The murder of Alexei Navalny (z”l) on February 16, 2024, has received a lot of attention. Navalny, one of the most vocal critics of Russian President Vladimir Putin, had been imprisoned in an Arctic penal colony for his crimes of standing up to Putin.
In his death, Navalny has taught us a great deal of powerful lessons. The more I have read about him, the more I am in awe of his dedication, commitment, ethics, and values. After being poisoned and recovering, he returned to Russia to continue his fight for the Russian people, despite knowing he would be arrested and imprisoned. Why would he return, knowing brutal imprisonment and likely death would be the result? In an Instagram post on Jan. 14, 2022, he wrote, “The question ‘to return or not’ never stood before me, mainly because I never left. I ended up in Germany, having arrived in an intensive care box, for one reason: they tried to kill me.”
Within weeks of his arrest, he sent a note to his friend and mentor, the journalist Yevgenia Albats. It read:
Zhenya, everything is O.K. History is happening. Russia is going through it, and we are coming along. We’ll make it (probably). I am all right, and I have no regrets. And you shouldn’t, either, and shouldn’t worry. Everything will be all right. And, even if it isn’t, we’ll have the consolation of having lived honest lives. Hugs!
I think about the courage and commitment it takes to think that everything will be alright, and if it isn’t, you still lived an honest life. Far too often today people need to be right. People need to win. People refuse to do what’s right because it’s not what is expedient or because it affects their ego. Navalny shows us that living that way isn’t worth it. It’s better to live honestly, where your word means something, where the focus is on the bigger picture, the long view. It is the famous line from Star Trek, The Wrath of Khan, “The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few. Or the one.” Far too many people focus on the needs of the one and neglect the needs of the many, of the larger community, of those that are impacted by the consequences of taking care of the needs of the one.
Spock and Kirk – the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one.
The Free Press posted his 2014 speech to the judges upon conviction of bogus charges. As I read it, I was struck by the power of both his words and that he addressed the panel of judges directly, calling them out on their behavior. When he said,
“I call you “people who look the other way.” Do you even notice that you are constantly looking down? You’re looking the other way. I am talking to you but you’re looking down all the time. None of you have anything to say.”
As I read the article, I could feel the shame of the judges as they were called out. He wasn’t willing to allow people to behave in an unethical or immoral manner without being made to face the choice that they made to sell out their values. Navalny was not afraid to hold those accountable who had not done what they were supposed to do. They did what Putin wanted. But as the Klingons in Star Trek would say, “You have no honor”. Navalny stresses the importance of honor. The criticalness of integrity. He understood and tried to communicate how without any of these things, life is hollow. Those who judged him had no honor or integrity because they didn’t stand for or live by their values. The lesson to us is to remember that. When we make choices in our personal and professional lives, do so with honor and integrity. Don’t look at the small picture of what it may do for us, look at the bigger picture of what it does for the world. Make sure you are able to live with yourself based on the choices and decisions that you make.
Later in the speech, he said,
“But, in spite of all of this, it’s important to me to address you, the people who will watch or read my last words. It’s more or less pointless, but the people who look the other way are also a battlefield. On one side of it are the crooks who have seized power in our country, and on the other are people who want to change this. We are fighting over the people who look the other way, the people who shrug their shoulders, the people who are in a situation where all they have to do is not do something cowardly, who do it anyway.”
In today’s world we are fighting over the people who just have to not do something cowardly, and they can help change the world. Stand up to hate. Stand up to terror. Stand up to lies. It’s easy to be a coward and go along with another leader tells you. It’s easy to be a coward and look down, avert your eyes, as injustice is done. Navalny, through is actions and his words, is teaching us all not to be cowards, not to just go along, shrug your shoulders, and allow the wrong thing to be done, even when we know it’s the wrong thing. He is telling us that our job isn’t done because people don’t care. Our job is to make them care. It reminds me of the famous line in Pirkei Avot (Ethics of our Fathers) that reads,
“It Is not up to you to finish the task, but you are not free to avoid it.”
It is not our responsibility for their choice of action or inaction. It is our responsibility to do what it takes to encourage them to take action. To act honorably. To act with integrity. In today’s world, too many people accept the status quo. They believe the lies they are told without asking any questions or doing any research. They take the simple way out, the way the judges in his case took the simple and easy path rather than the honest and difficult one. Navalny continues,
“There’s the famous quote from Dragon: “Yes, everyone was taught to be evil, but why did you have to be top of the class?” I’m not just talking about this court. A huge number of people are either forced to act like cowards or act like cowards without being forced or even asked to. They just look the other way and try to ignore what is happening. We are fighting for these people. We are trying to get them, you, to admit that everything that is happening in our society is based on endless lies.”
He isn’t giving up on those who are acting as cowards. He isn’t willing to write off this group of people who just go along, put their heads down so they don’t have to watch, and allow the lies to take root. Navalny is telling us that not only do they deserve a chance, but we need them to fight off the crooks, the bad people, often times our leaders. He is telling us that it is our job to inspire the masses who keep their head in the sand, don’t want to make waves, and let things be.
In today’s world, with the rising antisemitism and overall hatred, what could be more important? We live in a world where it has become challenging to have difficult conversations because people only want to be heard, not to listen. People want to be right, not to be informed. Navalny is telling us what Ghandi told us, that we have to be the change. We have to be the ones who will brave the tough discussions. We have to be the ones who will speak out. Who will take the risk? Who will work to inspire others to lift up their head, see the realities around us, and join in being the changemakers? He finished the speech by saying,
“Thank you, everyone, for your support. I know for a fact that when they isolate and imprison me, another will take my place. Nothing I did was unique or special. Anyone can do what I did. Live not by lies.”
I think this is perhaps the most important part of his entire speech. Many people hold him up to be a hero. To make him into something unique and special. And while he was unique and special, it was because of what he chose to do. We all can choose to do that. We all can stand up to injustice. We all can look for the greater good. All of us have the opportunity to not be silent and bury our heads in the sand. When I read this, I hear him saying that even when he is gone, he can be replaced by many others. It’s our job to make sure we are included in the group that is going to make a difference. That is going to stand up and speak out. That isn’t going to allow the lies to go unchallenged. That isn’t afraid of the consequences to speak up and take action because we know the consequences of being silent are so much worse.
I think of my Uncle Ralph Preiss who grew up in Berlin in the 1930s. He was there during Kristallnacht (the night of broken glass). He tells, with great emotion even today, the story of him being told in 1st grade that he could no longer pledge allegiance to the Fuhrer (Adolph Hitler) because as a Jew, he was not his Fuhrer. The praise he gives to President Quezon and the Frieder Brothers (from Cincinnati) who did all they could to save Jews from the Nazis by getting them to the Philippines. They spoke out and stepped up and saved many lives as a result. They didn’t put their head in the sand and pretend nothing was happening. Instead, they took action to save Jews. Many of us have seen Schindler’s List but few of us know anybody who was saved by Schindler. I am grateful to President Quezon and the Frieder brothers for saving my Uncle Ralph.
My Uncle Ralph Preiss telling his story on International Holocaust Rembrance Day in 2021.
Alexei Navalny gave his life for what he believed in. In his letters to Natan Sharansky from the gulag, printed in The Free Press, he clearly knows what is in store for him, yet he and Sharansky are able to joke and laugh because they both fought for something far greater than themselves. Just like his 2014 speech, in his first letter to Sharansky he writes,
“Nonetheless, the “virus of freedom” is far from being eradicated. It is no longer tens or hundreds as before, but tens and hundreds of thousands who are not scared to speak out for freedom and against the war, despite the threats. Hundreds of them are in prisons, but I am confident that they will not be broken and they will not give up.”
In 2014 he talked about somebody taking up after him. Here he writes about tens and hundreds of thousands who are willing to speak out for freedom. The virus of freedom that Putin is trying to eradicate is instead growing. This is what happens when we take the risk and stand up for what we believe in. When we do the right thing and live with integrity, even if it makes it harder for us individually, as it makes it better for the entire community. Navalny may no longer be among the living, but his ideas and ideals live on far beyond him. And more and more people are now picking up the responsibility from him, taking it on themselves, and working to make the world a better place. Just like those in Russia that he writes about, we have that same responsibility in the United States. We cannot be silent. We cannot stand by while antisemitism and hate continues to grow. We cannot put our heads in the sand, hoping that it will go away or they won’t notice us and will leave us alone. We saw how that worked in the Shoah. We have thousands of years of history that show us how it doesn’t work. Navalny is reminding us, once again, that silence only helps those who want to harm others.
Sharansky, in his response to Navalny, had a passage that struck me deeply.
I was very angered by the question of a certain European correspondent the day after your return to Russia. “Why did he return? We all knew that he would be arrested in the airport—does he not understand such simple things?” My answer was pretty rude: “You’re the one who doesn’t understand something. If you think that his goal is survival—then you are right. But his true concern is the fate of his people—and he is telling them: ‘I am not afraid and you should not be afraid either.’”
Sharansky, who himself spent 8 years in the gulag for standing up for what he believed, understands that survival, while important, is not the most important driving force. Standing up for your beliefs, for what is right, having morals and ethics, living with integrity, is far more important. Showing others, through his own example, that they don’t have to be afraid and that they can make a difference is what matters. Sharansky did it himself. He will also be a hero to me as his struggle in Russia happened when I was a child. I remember him being sentenced to the gulag for wanting to be a Jew and wanting to move to Israel. I remember his release and the celebration that occurred upon it. And I remember meeting him in DC and truly feeling like I was in the presence of somebody great. The lesson from Navalny and reiterated by Sharansky is that we can all be that person. Both Navalny and Sharansky play down their own heroism to play up the role that each of us needs to take to better the world. We can, and should, learn from their teachings.
The time I met Natan Sharansky. I was with my best friend, Todd Sukol.
The final letter from Navalny to Sharansky had a simple but powerful line that resonated for me. He wrote,
“But I continue to believe that we will correct it and one day in Russia there will be what was not. And will not be what was.”
He doesn’t talk about in his lifetime. He doesn’t talk about survival. He doesn’t even talk about himself. It’s all about the future of the country and the people who live there. His concern isn’t for his well-being but for the greater good. The selflessness in this line is so incredibly powerful and inspirational. When I read what he and Sharansky wrote about taking action, I can relate to that and it inspires me to so. When I read this line, I see true greatness. Few of us can truly look beyond our own lives, sacrificing our lives, in order for a brighter future that is not promised but we believe in. It’s an inspiration to do better. It’s a reminder that the world existed before us and will exist after us. What matters is what we do while we are here, not how long we are here. We get to decide that.
In Sharansky’s final reply to Navalny, he quotes he first verse of Nikolai Zabolotsky’s poem “Ne pozvolai dushe lenitsa” writing,
“Do not let your soul be lazy, to not pound water in mortar, the soul is forced to labor, both day and night, both day and night.” In Russia, people struggle with this, but you do it effortlessly.”
The brilliance of these two men who understand that the world is greater than themselves is astounding. The way they are able to communicate, not only to each other but to the world, the importance of taking action and not sitting by idly, is inspiring. Each of these men spent years in the gulag, in the arctic circle, living in terrible conditions, yet expressed no regret for their actions, no fear for the possible outcome of death, working to inspire others to follow their lead to change the world. As the poem expresses, we cannot let our souls be lazy, we cannot just stand by and do nothing while the world implodes. Our soul, our very beings, are forced to do the hard work all day, every day, to improve the world. We often talk about Tikkun Olam, repairing the world, and do so with periods of activity. Both Navalny and Sharansky remind us that the job is not to do occasional acts to repair the world, it’s to constantly be living and acting in a way that does repair the world. In that final sentence above, Sharansky recognizes that this struggle and effort is not easy for people and most struggle with it. He complements Navalny, who like Sharansky, were able to do it with such dignity and deep belief, that it looked effortless, even though they both know it’s anything but.
Alexei Navalny (z”l) was and is an inspiration to us all. While many of today’s youth only know Sharansky from his time in Israel, as a member of the Knesset, as the head of the Jewish Agency for Israel (JAFI) and who he has become after his release from Russia, he was Navalny in the 70s and early 80s. These two men teach and inspire us to be better human beings and to do better. They remind us through not just their words but also their actions that freedom is not free, that to have the world we want to live in requires sacrifice and effort. They tell us point blank that if we want to sit back and let others do the work, the work will not get done.
My friend Ari Shabat finishes his weekly video blog on the torah portion by saying “This Shabbat, I’m going to think about……”. I’m going to copy him this week. This Shabbat I’m going to think about the things that I am doing to improve the world and the things I am willing to stand on the sidelines while others do the work. I’m going to focus on what I can and should be doing to live with integrity, in line with my values, and to truly be involved in Tikkun Olam all day, every day, like the poet that Sharansky quoted wrote. Today I am going to do what I can to make the world a better place.
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