Over the past few years, I have struggled to find media that would educate, inspire, challenge, and interest me. Most of the main stream media (MSM) comes with their own biases. They are no longer focused on informing viewers/readers of the facts but rather on putting their spin and convincing the viewers/readers of a specific point of view. About 18 months ago, I discovered The Free Press and about 14 months ago became a paid subscriber. It is the best money I spend every year. There is diversity of viewpoints. Interesting articles that make me think. Positions that challenge my beliefs and cause me to take pause and rethink and re-evaluate what I believe. Today’s Free Press provides a wide variety of examples.
I choose to write about this today because we so rarely have the opportunity to engage with things that challenge our thinking. Today’s world is focused on finding those we agree with and immersing ourselves with them. Most people have their TV news that they watch and stick to it – CNN, MSNBC, FOX, ABC, NBC, CBS, etc. The same is true with newpapers and magazines. The NY Times, Washington Post, The Wall Street Journal, etc. As I read through the summary of today’s Free Press, I found five (5) articles that intrigued me. That made me think. I want to share them with you along with my thoughts and why each one interested me.
There has been a lot of talk for a number of years about vaccines. I’m a believer that vaccines work. I’m vaccinated. My kids are vaccinated. We believe in science. Do vaccines have a link to autism? (The data clearly says no.) There has been a long debate about the Covid vaccine (full disclosure – I got the vaccine and 2 boosters.) My wife and I argue about the flu vaccine as it seems I only get the flu when I get the vaccine. I don’t get it any longer and have promised her that if/when I get the flu and it’s really bad, I will get the vaccine the next year. It’s been about 6 years since I had the flu. I know there is no statistical validity to this belief (my father-in-law is a pulmonologist and we have this conversation every year and I know I frustrate both him and my wife) but it’s working for me so I’ll continue until it doesn’t. With the rise of Robert F. Kennedy Jr. in the incoming administration, vaccines are under scrutiny once again. In today’s Free Press, there is a powerful piece about the polio vaccine, currently under attack.
I’m very grateful for vaccines like the polio and smallpox vaccines. They eliminated horrible diseases. Watching vaccine deniers push their agenda scares me. I remember when my younger son’s school had an outbreak of Whooping Cough in Seattle. I was startled and then learned that in Seattle, vaccines are optional for school attendance. That shocked me. Vaccines save lives. The article in the Free Press is a powerful reminder of what life was like before the polio vaccine. The way families suffered and children died. We live in a world where we often forget the realities of the past, of what the world looked like before vaccines, before medical breakthroughs and before advances we take for granted. My father had an older sister, Barbara, that he never knew because she died as an infant. What killed her in the early 1940s was completely treatable by the 1960s. We cannot allow our society to regress against science. I’m thankful for this powerful article that reminds me how far we have come and how much work we have to do to ensure we don’t return to those dark days of death by what are now preventable diseases.
There has been a lot of unbelievable support for Luigi Mangione’s alleged murder of United Healthcare CEO Brian Thompson. Like many other people, I have many issues with health insurance, the cost, the coverage, and the need for radical reformation. That does not excuse murder. That does not permit murder. We have seen such incredible political violence in the past few years that it is frightening. We see it on college campuses with antisemitism. We see the antisemitic violence in the streets of London. We see antisemitic violence in New York, California, and throughout Canada. Across the world and throughout America. Today’s Free Press has a great article about why political violence occurs.
As I read the article, I was reminded of the political violence in the 60s and 70s. How today’s leaders have been able to forget that political violence cost us the lives of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., Bobby Kennedy, Malcom X, and President John F. Kennedy (conspiracy theorists may disagree here) amazes me. I found it interesting that the author stated that the political violence went away without having any meaningful effect. Nothing was solved by the political violence and yet it still went away. It is a reminder that, “such a situation is unsustainable, because political violence cannot coexist with a functioning democracy.”
As I read the article, it made me realize that so many things happen in our world because we allow them. If we tolerate bad behavior, it happens. We have allowed money to rule politics so it does. If we were to demand changes, they would happen. But we don’t. Congress complains about dark money when the other party is raising big dollars that way but won’t pass laws to outlaw it because they want to do better in raising it themselves. They allow it and use it as a political tool. Immigration is another example. Instead of taking action to create real immigration reform, our political parties use it as a weapon against their opponents. Political violence is no different. As the author stated so simply and eloquently, “All of this suggests that political violence is downstream of public support, and that political violence happens because we let it.”
The media covers the war between Israel and Hamas in Gaza. Between Israel and Hezbollah in Lebanon. They cover the rockets being fired from Yemen by the Houthis. They report on the uprising in Syria and the overthrow of the Assad regime. They don’t cover what is happening in Georgia though (the country not the U.S. State). According to the media, there is nothing worth covering there. Today’s Free Press does a great job highlighting the uprising in Georgia by the pro-Western groups and what they are dealing with. You would think that our media would want to cover people looking to overthrow tyranny because they want more freedom like the West. You would think that something so validating for the freedoms we have, people risking their lives because they want what we have, would be leading the news. The more I read, the more upset I got at our media. We did this the last time the Iranian people attempted to rise up against the tyranny of their government and the regime survived. We did this when the Syrian people tried to overthrow Assad a decade allow, allowing Russia and Iran to save his dictatorship.
The uprising in Tbilisi, Georgia
When I read the closing lines of the article, I am inspired by the people of Georgia. I am inspired by the hope they have for a better future. I am inspired by their willingness to sacrifice for a better life. And, I am ashamed of how we sit by idly, doing nothing to help, nothing to support their efforts, and allow tyranny to remain. “As he regained consciousness, the man, who called himself Jimmy, spoke with me. ‘Every day, it’s hard for me to wake up, fearing that they’ll do something worse,’ he said, lighting a cigarette. ‘Life has to mean something, and right now, it’s worth fighting for this—to crumple up the regime and throw it into the trash where it belongs.'” How do Jimmy’s words not inspire you? How do you not want to help? How do you not want to take action ourselves to make life worth living, to make sure life has meaning?
Caitlin Clark is an incredible basketball player. The fact that she is a woman and plays in the WNBA doesn’t diminish her skills or talent. She has single handedly brought women’s basketball and the WNBA to a new level. There have been and there are many great women’s basketball players. None has been able to do for the league and women’s basketball what Caitlin has done over the past two season, in college and now in the WNBA. She has been involved in controversy this week for seemingly apologizing for being a white player. The Free Press wrote about her and this challenge today.
Yet she gets terrible abuse from WBNA players and even owners because of her race. Because she is white. “Sheila Johnson, the black owner of the Washington Mystics, echoed Wilson, telling CNN that the only reason Clark was getting the acclaim was because she was white.” Yet 31% of the Mystics annual attendance came from the two games Caitlin Clark played there. She is the league’s star. There are many outstanding players in the WNBA. I didn’t like watching it for years because it wasn’t very good basketball. Today’s WNBA is very good basketball. It’s fun to watch because of the quality of play. My favorite games that I want to watch are when Caitlin Clark is playing against her college rival, Angel Reese. They don’t like each other. They are both great players. It reminds me of Larry Bird against Magic Johnson. Bird against Dr. J. Magic against Isiah Thomas. Only without the respect the men had for each other.
Caitlin Clark and Angel Reese, two rivals and great WNBA players
Reading the article made me wonder why we are so obsessed with race in America. I grew up with friends of all different races and religions. My friends were and are my friends. In the words of the great Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr., it is about “the content of their character.” Would I watch the WNBA if it’s main star was Angel Reese? Maybe. She’s a great player. Do I want to watch every game when she is playing against her rival, Caitlin Clark? Absolutely. Do I watch other WNBA games? Not really. The finals this year were amazing and I have friends who watched it. I stopped watching when Caitlin Clark’s team was eliminated. The same way I stop watching baseball when my favorite team, the New York Yankees are eliminated.
It’s a shame that in the WNBA, basketball can’t be just about on the court talent. It’s a sign of the times, of the challenges we face in America. As long as we remain obsessed with race, we are the ones who lose. We can’t appreciate the greatness of talent because we see it as color specific talent. I hate that. I like watching talented performers because of their talent, not because of, or in spite of, their race. I like the beauty of sports, of music, of art, dance, and writing because of how it makes me feel and how it inspires me, not because the person who is behind it is a specific color, race, religion, or ethnic background. Maybe we can all strive to pay attention to that, instead of race, religion, or ethnicity. I think we would all be a little better if we did.
The last article of the day is about assisted death. It is something I struggle with. Earlier this year, we chose to put down our beloved 13 1/2 year old Labrador Retriever, Bella. I was the last holdout. I saw the light in her eyes until the very end, when I saw her agony. Making that final decision was very difficult and still brings tears to my eyes. Sitting with her on our couch, the entire family loving on her as the vet gave her the medicine that would end her suffering, was both beautiful and heartbreaking. If we do it for the animals we love, why can’t we do it for the people we love?
My dad died on September 6, 2022. Getting woken up at 1:30 in the morning to hear the news is something burned into my memory. I saw him a few hours earlier and expected to see him that morning. I believe that he chose to die when he did out of kindness to our family and to himself. The life he would have lived would be very different from the way he lived his life up to that point. He was able to do for himself and for the family what we would have never been able to do. Forget about the legalities, which the article addresses well. Earlier the day before, my mom signed the Do Not Resuscitate (DNR) paperwork. I walked in to the hospital room just after she signed it and she was in tears. We knew he didn’t want to live with no quality of life and she was able to sign the DNR. Would we have ever been able to go that extra step? I don’t think so.
The article has me thinking deeply about why. Why, as hard as it was, could I do it for Bella but don’t think I could have done it for my dad? What stops me from being willing to offer the grace of ending suffering to a human that I love when I can do it, as hard as it is, for an animal? What does it say about me? What does it say about our society? Do we value breathing that much over truly living? What is my definition of living? If it were me, would I want my family to be able to end my suffering? Or should I suffer and ‘be alive’ just because it alleviates guilt?
These are hard questions with no easy answer. I’m grateful that there is a publication that, in just one day, can have five (5) articles that really make me think. That inspire conversations. Each author has their own perspective yet writes in a way that doesn’t say you are wrong if you disagree with them. It is true journalism. If you are looking for a publication that will make you think every single day (I haven’t even talked about the Honestly podcast or the debates they offer), subscribe to The Free Press. You won’t regret it.
I’ve written about Bayard Rustin a few times since I learned about him. He was an incredible friend to the Jewish people and an avid Zionist, even visiting Israel and meeting with then Prime Minister Golda Meir. I decided to watch the new movie about his life, focusing on how he made the March on Washington occur. It’s available on Netflix.
Watch the trailer
I was stunned as I watched the opening scenes of the movie which depict the end of segregation and the first time African Americans were attending the same schools at white students. Not because of how awful and vile what happened at that time was. Not because of the suffering those students went through to bravely fight for their right to equal opportunity. I was stunned because it looked exactly like what Jewish students are facing on college campuses today. People yelling in their face. Calling them names. Treating them like second class citizens. It was horrible and unacceptable then. It is horrible and unacceptable now. Yet it’s happening every single day on college campuses across the country and in Canada.
Jewish students forced to hide and barricade themselves in the library at Cooper Union in NY.
Bayard Rustin was the brains and genius behind the march of Washington, DC where Dr. King gave his “I have a dream speech”. He talked about having the largest peaceful protest in history – 100,000 people on the National Mall (the actual number was 250,000). After October 7th, I was part of 300,000 people who gathered together peacefully in Washington, DC., in support of Israel and the Jewish people. When it was announced, I knew I had to be there. I knew that I wanted to be able to tell my future grandchildren that I was there. I wanted to be a role model for my children, nephews, and nieces, that I went and was part of it. It felt like a big hug, being there with signs supporting Israel and demanding the release of the hostages. Singing Hatikvah with 300,000 people was something I will never forget. History repeats itself – in 1963 it was the March on Washington for civil rights. In 2023 it was the rally for Israel with 300,000 people gathering to not just support Israel and the Jewish people but support each other.
There is a scene in the movie where Bayard tries to get the NAACP on board with the march. The head of the NAACP, Roy Wilkins, was afraid of what might happen if they had 100,000 ‘Negroes’ coming to Washington to protest. In the scene, they talk about other marches with far fewer people and highlight one, from 1932, done by WWI veterans. President Hoover unleashed the military to break up the march. Using tear gas and bayonets, the military chased away the veterans and those supporting them, burning their shanty towns in the process. Wilkins asks in the movie, “what was their race?” The answer, “they were white.” His fear of what might happen led the NAACP to say no to the march. We face the same thing today in the Jewish community. We have many communal leaders, many Jewish stars in sports, entertainment, and politics, who are afraid to take a bold position after October 7th, with the rise of antisemitism everywhere, out of fear of what might happen to them. This fear paralyzes us and results in more damage occurring to Israel and the Jewish people everywhere. It’s ok to be afraid, it’s not ok to let that fear paralyze us into inaction. As Jews, we have thousands of years of history that shows us what happens when we live in fear, when we don’t act, when we just try to be a part of some other society and don’t stand up and fight for ourselves when threatened. I made the decision after October 7th to not be paralyzed by fear. I made the decision to speak out against the evil of Hamas and of the Iranian leaders. I made the decision to call out antisemitism whenever and wherever I see it. It’s an ongoing conversation in my family as they are concerned about what some crazy, hate filled person might do. How I may be targeted. How my family may be targeted. One thing I know from our Jewish history is that if we stay silent, we will all end up being targeted, we will all end up being harmed. I’m not willing to repeat the mistakes of the past. Bayard Rustin wasn’t willing to accept being paralyzed by the fear of what might happen at the march. He knew that doing nothing would result in a far worse outcome. I hope we, as Jews, can learn from his leadership and not be afraid to stand up for ourselves, to speak out, to call out those who hate us and wish to harm us.
As they talk about what date to hold the march, the first suggestion is a Monday. Bayard replies, “Mondays are hard for our Pastors.” He then adds, “and Fridays are bad for our Jewish friends.” It’s a great reminder that as Jews, we were active in the civil rights movement. We played an important role and built a strong relationship with the African American community. In the years since then, for whatever reason, that relationship has deteriorated. We, as the Jewish community, don’t have the relationships we need with many other groups. We do with the Evangelical Christian community because THEY have been active supporters of Israel. We have neglected our relationships with other groups. As a large community, we are absent on MLK Day and the celebrations. As a group, we are not there during Pride month. As a group, we are not joining our Muslim brothers for their community Iftars during Ramadan. Because we have neglected these relationships, we see many of these groups not being there for us when we need them. It’s our responsibility to be there for them before we need them to be there for us. Bayard Rustin showed that when he was considerate of Shabbat and that if the march was on a Friday, the Jewish community couldn’t be there. He knew we’d be there for them if he was thoughtful first. I hope that we can learn to invest in these relationships outside the Jewish community. We are so hyper-focused on what’s going on inside the Jewish community that we are not ensuring the relationships we need outside the Jewish community are strong.
Bayard Rustin with Prime Minister Golda Meir during his visit to Israel in 1969
The movie has 2 scenes in which Senator Strom Thurmond plays a key role. In the first, he makes allegations against Dr. King about being a communist because Bayard Rustin, one of his close friends, was involved with the communist party earlier in his life. This false allegation was designed to stop the march and to create problems for Dr. King. The second is when he goes on the radio to ‘out’ Bayard Rustin as a ‘pervert’ due to his conviction for engaging in homosexual sex to attempt to stop the march from happening. It’s very similar to the false allegations against Israel being made by Representatives Rashida Talib, Ilhan Omar, Cori Bush, Jamal Bowman, Alexandria Ocasio Cortez, and many others today. Senator Thurmond was a known racist. The Representatives I mentioned above are known antisemites. Bayard fought against Senator Thurmond and wouldn’t allow him to win. Today, we must do the same against these antisemites in our own government. We can’t allow them to win. We can’t excuse their statements or their behavior.
There are two very powerful lines in the movie that apply to our Jewish community today. The first is when Bayard Rustin says to Dr. King, “when we tell ourselves such lies, start to live and believe such lies, we do the work of our oppressor by oppressing ourselves.” We have far too many people in our Jewish community who tell themselves lies about Israel and Zionism, who live and believe these lies, and not only do the work of antisemites but do it better than they do. It is our obligation to confront these lies in our own community. It is responsibility to make sure that members of our Jewish community are educated with the facts, not with the lies that Jew haters tell. Bayard Rustin knew that about his community. I hope we learn that lesson for ours.
The second line I am referring to also comes from Bayard Rustin speaking to Dr. King in the scene when he says, “on the day I was born black, I was also born homosexual. They either believe in freedom and justice for all, or they do not.” The same holds true today. Countries either have a right to defend themselves or they do not. Countries either have a right to make peace with their enemies through direct negotiations or they do not. Countries either get to have their democratic election processes or they do not. Israel cannot be held to a different standard than every other country in the world. When they do that, just like Bayard Rustin knew about freedom for all people, they are being antisemitic and going against the values they say they believe in. We cannot let them get away with it. Bayard stood up and spoke out and got the support from those he needed to speak out as well. We need to do the same. We cannot allow the double standard to continue to exist. We must demand our leaders, both political and those with large followings, do the same and speak out. We must condemn those who use the double standard to hide their antisemitism. It is not up to others to do this. It is up to us.
Near the end of the movie, the 10 heads of the committee for the March on Washington are invited to the White House to meet with President Kennedy. Somebody says that Bayard should be with him. Bayard already won – the March happened and was a huge success. He declines and says he is going to pick up trash. The rest leave to meet the President and he takes a bag and begins to pick up trash. The young people who follow him are shown with admiration in their eyes. They get it. It is about the work. It is about making things happen and driving change. Who gets the credit isn’t important to those who really want change. The same holds true for the Jewish community. You see this more in Israel than in the United States. In Israel they are all heroes because they do what is necessary. Civilians volunteering in the fields to pick produce. IDF soldiers risking everything for their country and the Jewish people. People moving all over the country to help those displaced with educational needs, healthcare needs, mental health needs, and whatever needs they have. In the United States we tend to focus more on who gets the credit. Who is the public face. We need to learn this lesson from Bayard Rustin. It’s the same lesson Ronald Reagan spoke about. In the words of President Harry S. Truman,“It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.” We have a lot of work ahead of us to fight antisemitism, to advocate for Israel, to educate both the Jewish and non-Jewish community, and for our survival. We can’t worry about who gets the credit, we have to be willing to pick up a bag and collect trash.
The saying on Ronald Reagan’s desk from the Harry Truman quote. We can all learn from this
The song at the end of the movie, Road to Freedom, is by Lenny Kravitz. Lenny is African American and Jewish. How fitting for the blog post. The lessons of Bayard Rustin applied to 2024 antisemitism through the song written and sung by an African American Jew.
I watched the movie Rustin to learn more about a man I recently learned about and have been fascinated with. How did such an important figure in the civil rights movement get basically erased from our history? How many others like him are there? I seem to learn about more of them all the time. Yet while watching the movie to learn about him, there were so many lessons that apply to our lives today. To the world we live in today. The fight for civil rights is not over. So many communities are still fighting it today. In the Jewish community, we fooled ourselves into thinking we were not one of them. October 7th and the aftermath showed us we are. While we still have many who don’t think this is true, who ‘do the work of the oppressor by oppressing ourselves,’ the rise in antisemitism in the United States and around the world shows us that that it is true. We have much to learn from the life of Bayard Rustin, an avid Zionist and friend to the Jewish people. I could write an entire post just about his connection to the Jewish people and the State of Israel. Let’s take a moment to thank him and honor his memory by learning the lessons he taught us and apply them today. From what I have learned about him, I think he’d really like that.
Bayard Rustin standing behind Dr. King during the I have a Dream speech
I grew up in an interesting community. In the 1970s and early 1980’s, Harrisburg, Pennsylvania was very middle America and a very integrated place. My friends growing up were of various ethnicities and backgrounds. We went to school together, played together, and grew up together. I like to joke that because 1/3 of my public school was Jewish, we were closed for Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, and you would see tons of Matzo at lunch during Passover. But because it was Central Pennsylvania, we were also closed the first day of deer hunting season, because 1/3 of the school (including teachers) wouldn’t be there.
My friends were Christian, Jewish, and Hindu. They were African American, Indian, and Caucasian. They were gay and straight (although nobody had come out at that time, we all knew). They were in the gifted program and in the regular educational program. They came from different socio-economic backgrounds. We were kids who liked each other and hung out together and were friends. It’s amazing how many of them I keep in touch with even to this day.
Growing up in this environment, I didn’t see the challenges that some of my friends faced. They were my friends, so the fact that they were African American or gay wasn’t an issue to me and I wrongly assumed it wasn’t an issue in general. I was ignorant because I made a key false assumption that people thought the way I thought. As a result, I never saw the challenges they faced or would face in the future.
When October 7th happened, not only was I horrified, I also expected that the world would be horrified with me. When I saw that not only were they not horrified but they also wanted more October 7th type violence against Jews, that they blamed Jews for being attacked and murdered by terrorists, and that the world openly turned against the Jews, I got it. I finally understood what my friends dealt day in and day out that I never saw. Just like I saw them as people first, there are those who see Jews as people first. But there are far more who are filled with hatred towards Jews. I felt guilty for how I missed what my friends dealt with and deal with.
Protests defending the rape, murder, and kidnapping of Jews by Hamas after October 7th
I used to get frustrated when I would see things like ‘Queers for Palestine’ and think to myself, “Don’t they know that they would be persecuted and killed there?” I would think, “Israel is the only place in the Middle East where you can be openly gay. Don’t they know that?” I would wonder, what’s wrong with them? Since October 7th and in the aftermath, I no longer think that way. I now wonder what did we do wrong? How did we let them identify with a group that hates them instead of with Israel? How did we abandon them? Sure we fought for gay rights, marriage equality, the right to adopt, and many other things. But we didn’t understand their challenges in the world. We didn’t identify WITH them. So instead they identify with those who would kill them, who want to kill us, because they did identify WITH them.
I used to wonder how the African American community could have forgotten the civil rights movement and how the Jewish community played such an integral role in fighting WITH them. How could they abandon the people who helped found the NAACP, who fought so closely in the 1960s for equal rights? Since October 7th and the aftermath, I now wonder, “How did we abandon them?” Where did WE go wrong? How did WE move on and no longer serve as allies, creating an identification with terrorists who hate the very freedom we fought together to have?
Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel marching with Dr. King
The same is true for a part of our Jewish community who fights against Israel. I used to wonder how THEY went wrong. How could THEY be self-hating, how could THEY not understanding their homeland, how could THEY be so misinformed? Since October 7th and the aftermath, I now wonder, how did WE lose them? How did WE not provide what they needed? What do WE need to change to ensure the future generations understand the real meaning of Zionism, the importance of Israel to all Jews, and that it’s ok to disagree with the ruling government without trying to delegitimize the only Jewish country in the world.
If it’s really on US to change then we have to do things differently. We have to not only invest in the relationship but also work to understand the barriers they face on an everyday basis.
I read about Bayard Rustin, an openly gay black man during the civil rights movement who was the architect of the 1963 March on Washington. He was the right-hand man for the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. until he was blackmailed and chose to step away rather than risk damaging Dr. King and the movement. A man who formed BASIC – Black Americans to Support Israel Committee in 1975. There was a movie made about his life in 2023 that is available on Netflix. I am fascinated by this amazing man that I never knew about and it made me wonder how many more people like him do I not know about. How many historic figures do our schools do not teach.
Bayard Rustin, a man I knew nothing about yet we all should.
I knew a little about the Tuskegee airmen but just a little. I read an article in The Free Press about them and the lesson in excellence that they taught us. It’s a lesson I never learned because schools don’t teach about them. There is a lot for me to learn about the Tuskegee airmen, much to read, much to understand. A few of the remaining airmen spoke in Orlando recently and I was disappointed that I had a conflict and couldn’t hear them speak. If I get the opportunity again, I won’t miss it. I heard a story from the event that really hit me. One of the airmen said that many years later he met a white pilot who the airmen had supported and escorted many times in battle. The white pilot had never met or known who escorted him so many years later, he went up and thanked him. I can’t even imagine doing what they did with that little recognition or acknowledgement. True heroes. I was so inspired by the article that just like the author, I am getting a piece of artwork signed by some of the actual airmen to hang in my office to remind me what excellence, bravery, and commitment are really about.
One of the autographed prints I am deciding amongst which will hang in my office
When I lived in Seattle, a friend of mine who is gay, made a comment, complimenting me and talking about Harvey Milk. I had heard the name but didn’t know much about him at that time. Since she was saying it as a compliment, I wanted to learn about him and his story. What I learned was fascinating and once again, I was stunned and disappointed that I never learned about him in school. I had always heard of the ‘Twinkie defense’ in California and we used to joke about it growing up and even in college. That was common knowledge. The fact that the man who murdered Harvey Milk was who got away with murder for using the Twinkie defense wasn’t something I learned until I started reading about him. I was stunned that such an important part of the story of the Twinkie defense was never taught. I watched the movie Milk, starring Sean Penn, and was amazed at what a great job they did telling his story.
Harvey Milk, who should be taught in our schools
I wrote earlier about my Palestinian friends and how I reached out to them to check on them. After Iran attacked Israel, I reached out to friends in Iran to see how they are doing. The people of Iran are not the government, and they have publicly supported Israel. They have painted things like “Israel bomb the Ayatollah’s house” and cheered for Israel in the streets. I am concerned about the safety of my friends in Iran, both from the government and potential attacks. Since October 7th and the aftermath, I don’t want to repeat the same mistakes we have made with other communities. So I reach out. I share empathy. I do my best to understand what they are going through and share what I am going through with them. Build on commonalities so we see our similarities.
I don’t know if it’s too late for the generation who thinks those that hate them are the ones they need to support. I don’t know if we can educate or change their minds. I know that I have to try. I know that I have an obligation to make a difference with those that I can. The Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. finished his famous ‘I have a dream’ speech with the following words:
And when this happens, and when we allow freedom ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God’s children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual:
Free at last! Free at last!
Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!
We need to speed up that day with our actions. I am committed. I ask you to join me.
Terrorism is one of those things that as Americans, we have always thought of happening elsewhere. Even when the Oklahoma City bombing occurred, it was by an American who many people made excuses for. It didn’t feel like real terrorist.
September 11, 2001, was supposed to have changed everything. Arab terrorists hijacked airplanes and flew two of them into the Twin Towers, one was crash landed in Shanksville, PA, and one crashed into the Pentagon. Nearly 3,000 Americans were murdered that day by terrorists. We felt what terrorism was like. We engaged in a war in Iraq and then Afghanistan that lasted for 20 years. But we were never hit again. Despite the concern that more attacks were coming, the United States has been spared a second terrorist attack after 9/11. And so, we have forgotten the horror of terrorism and terrorists. We have forgotten the evil.
Each September 11th, we remember in a lesser and lesser manner. It is not a national day of remembrance. It is not a sacred day. There isn’t a school assembly where all the names of the victims are read. Perhaps it’s the 20 years of war that came after that has us tired. Perhaps it is our lack of an attention span. Perhaps it is because we choose to get partisan and blame ‘the other party’ for either entering the war, not winning the war, or the way we finally exited the war. We paid a terrible price on September 11th and it’s a day that I will never forget. But as a country we remember it like we remember Pearl Harbor Day. “A day that will live in infamy” is no longer a recognizable quote to the millenial generation. I wonder if they would even recognize ‘Let’s Roll’ two decades after it was one of the most inspiring statements we heard.
Israel on the other hand, has had to deal with terrorist every day. I have spoken with IDF leaders who have told me what they stop every single day. And we see in the news what happens when a terrorist gets through. The first and second intifada along with rockets from Gaza and Lebanon, stabbings, shootings, kidnappings, and more.
I’ve been in Israel for Yom HaZikaron and Yom Ha’atzmaut (Israeli Memorial Day and Israeli Independence Day) and they are days you won’t ever forget. The country shuts down on Yom HaZikaron. TV only shows stories of heroic soldiers. The sirens at 7 pm and then at 11 am are dramatic and unforgettable. The names of those lost are read in each community. It is a powerful experience. Yom Ha’atzmaut starts right at the end of Yom HaZikaron and the mood changes from sadness to joy in an instant. Freedom is celebrated, not sales on mattresses or appliances. You can literally join any party going on in the country whether you know the people there or not. Israel never forgets.
But even Israel never imagined the horrors of October 7, 2023. Nobody, other than Hamas and Iran could imagined that occurring. Having seen the 47-minute Hamas video from October 7th, it was horrifying. And I know there is far worse that Israel has video of that they refuse to put into the public domain because of just how horrifying it is. Rapes, murders of babies, women and the elderly. Burning of people alive. Cooking babies alive in the oven while their mother is forced to watch, sometimes while also being raped. Seeing what the IDF soldiers saw, in real time, when they came upon the Nova Music Festival was haunting. I’ll never forget the bodies strewn everywhere, the anxiety in the voices of the IDF soldiers as they hoped to find anybody alive and the disappointment each time they realized that nobody was left alive.
The Nova music festival. I’ve seen the video of what the first responders of the IDF saw when they arrived and it’s horrifying.
In the United States, it is as if 9/11 never happened. We blame Israel for it happening. We hold Israel responsible for the evil of Hamas, using children, women, and the elderly as human shields. We ignore the hostages, now taken over 160 days ago. We excuse UNRWA for their participation in the horrors of October 7th, in hiding hostages after their abduction, and for their theft of humanitarian aid for the people of Gaza and diverted to Hamas. When the people of Gaza riot because humanitarian aid is coming in and going to UNRWA to distribute and they know that means it goes to Hamas, we blame Israel. When Hamas fires on the people of Gaza trying to get the humanitarian aid before Hamas can steal it, we blame Israel. We continue to fail to hold Hamas responsible or recognize that they are pure evil.
We, and the world, have convinced ourselves, that this is between the Palestinians and the Israelis. We have convinced ourselves that this is about the need for a Palestinian state or about Israeli construction in Judea and Samaria. We fool ourselves into ignoring the influence of Iran and their goal of creating a new Caliphate, with the Iranians and radical Shiite Muslims in charge with everybody living under Sharia law. We forget that we are the infidel they rail against, thinking it’s just Israel, it’s just the Jews.
We also forget that they hate anybody who isn’t like them, even other muslims. On October 7th, Hamas didn’t care if you were Jewish, Muslim, Christian, American, or Thai. They hated everybody. That’s what happens with evil. And if you don’t destroy evil, evil wins.
Even the people of Gaza are now holding Hamas responsible. Now that they don’t have to fear for their lives because Hamas killed any opposition and are not in charge any longer, they are speaking out loudly. While some of the people were involved with October 7th and many more support the hatred, there are plenty who want to live in peace with their neighbor Israel. I found the same thing in Judea and Samaria when, in 2019, I went to meet with leaders of Palestinian civil society. Take away the corrupt government and the evil of terrorists and there is a possibility for peace.
We choose to blame the government of Israel, Bibi Netanyahu, the far right fanatics in the government like Itamar Ben-Gvir, or the ultra-religious Jews in Israel for the hate coming from Hamas, Hezbollah, the Houthis, and Iran. We choose to excuse barbaric behavior because it is against Jews. Remember #BringBackOurGirls from 2014 after 276 high school girls were abducted from a government school in Chibok, Nigeria? Remember the number of celebrities who stood out, loud and proud, that no woman or girl should be taken captive, raped and held against their will? That only counts if you aren’t Jewish.
Julia Roberts is one of many celebrities who spoke out in 2014 that remain silent now. Shame on them.
Remember 1979 and the hostage crisis in Iran? It spawned the TV show Nightline to keep everybody up to date on a daily basis. Yet the hostages taken by Hamas – including Americans and Muslims – draw no attention. Kfir Bibas, stolen when he was 8 months old, celebrated his first birthday in captivity. His four-year-old brother Ariel was also kidnapped and remains in captivity. What type of barbarism is this and better yet, what type of human beings are we that allow this happen and aren’t marching in the streets of every country to free these babies?
Kfir and Ariel Bibas. Babies. Hostages. How the world is not outraged is inexcusable. It’s only a matter of time before it happens here.
Noa Argmani and Naama Levi, two beautiful young women were attending a music festival, like many of our young adults do. They were attacked by butchers who murdered young adults in cold blood, savagely raped them for the crime of being in Israel. Noa and Naama were taken hostage. Who knows what brutality they have faced since October 7th? We can all imagine the worst after what we saw these Hamas terrorists do to girls, women, and the elderly.
Noa Argmani and Naama Levi, taken hostage by Hamas on October 7th. We don’t know what brutality they have faced or if they remain alive. Where is the outrage?
They aren’t the only young women taken hostage and being brutalized in the tunnels beneath Gaza. And if you think it’s only over there and only Jewish women so you are safe, look at the signs held by AMERICANS in NEW YORK CITY on Sunday. “Rape is resistance”. “Babies are occupiers too”. After the killing of George Floyd, we had resistance in major cities like Seattle, Portland, and Minneapolis. Today these people would tell you that raping your wife, daughter, or mother would be acceptable because it’s ‘resistance’. I remember reading about how in Seattle people went to homes and told the owners that it wasn’t their house. That they were occupying land and had no right to live in the houses they purchased. These same people would say that kidnapping their children would be acceptable because they were ‘occupiers’. Don’t fool yourself that it is only there and only for Jews.
Remember these signs when your baby is taken or when your wife, sister, daughter, or mother is raped. This is in NYC this past weekend!
Jews have long been the ‘canary in the coal mine’. What happens to Jews happens to others afterward. Take a minute to do a search for “Jews canary in the coal mine”. You will see articles going back years documenting this. It’s not post-October 7th. It’s history. When we allow this to happen, we encourage it to happen to us.
Just last week, an illegal migrant from Lebanon was caught at border. He admitted that he is a Hezbollah terrorist and was hoping ‘to make a bomb’ and was headed for NY. Terrorism is in the United States. It’s just a matter of when and where the event happens. Or events happen. We are worried about planes that have issues with maintenance and construction while nobody has died in a major airline plane crash since 2009. How will we reconcile our priorities when people die in America at the hands of terrorists? Who will we blame? One thing we know for sure is that nobody will take responsibility.
Two weeks ago, a grenade was found in the back seat of an Uber in New York. As the bomb squad tried to get to the car to assess the situation, defuse the grenade, and save lives, Anti-Israel protesters blocked the police from reaching grenade in the Uber during a Times Square march. Luckily the grenade was inert and nobody was harmed by it. The hatred for Israel and Jews was more important than saving the lives of people in the area from a possible live grenade. We were lucky this time that it was inert. Next time?
People climbing on the police care as officers try to address a grenade in a nearby UberProtesters climbing on the police car and blocking police from getting to a nearby Uber with a grenade in it.
Last night was the ZOA gala in Hollywood, Florida. Peopel who support the existance of a Jewish homeland gathering together to celebrate it. We have many nation states in the world for people of all backgrounds, faiths, cultures, etc. There is only one Jewish state and that’s what Zionism is – the belief that we should have. Zionism is not colonialism as there is no desire to expand beyond our historical homeland. There is no aparthaid. The declaration of independence speaks clearly about being a home for all peoples. Zionism isn’t about Bibi Netanyahu, merely the most recent elected Prime Minister. His time will end and there will be a new Prime Minister. And a new one after that. And so on and so on. At this wonderful event last night, in order to ‘help Palestinians’, people assaulted a Jewish person with an Israeli flag. How does that help Palestinians? How does that help the people of Gaza? We know they don’t care about the hostages because they are Jewish. Instead of listening to the people of Gaza about Hamas and working to create a place where Palestinians can live peacefully with their neighbor Israel, instead of building a country with hospitals that are not armories, schools that teach math and science, not hate, these people merely want to hate. Watch th video and see hatred, see evil. If they really wanted to help the Palestinians and the people of Gaza they would listen to them and push for an end to Hamas.
Violence outside the ZOA gala just because he has an Israeli flag
Last week, I heard Senator Chuck Schumer speak passionately about Israel and Israel’s right, as a sovereign nation, to defend herself. He spoke about the evil of Hamas and how they must be defeated. He spoke about the special relationship between the United States and Israel. He was animated. He was passionate. Three days later, he completely backtracked, calling for early elections in a sovereign country. He let partisan politics overtake his moral, ethics, and values. I was disgusted. Not just disappointed, not just angry, but disgusted. Here is one of our elected leaders, in one of the most high ranking positions in our government, a self identified Jew, talking out of both sides of his mouth without integrity. This isn’t about likeing or not liking Bibi. This isn’t about thinking he is the problem or the solution. This is a democratic country that has free elections and has a process for them. Unlike the Palestinian Authority, where Mahmoud Abbas is now in year 19 of his 4 year team. Let that sink in for a minute. No calls for elections in year 19 of his 4 year term. I’m not sure Senator Schumer can regain my trust. Our leaders continue to lose our trust based on their lack of integrity, lack of morals and values. When our leaders don’t have them, how much longer can we exist as a democracy (or a republic for those who want to be critical).
A TikTok trend in 2023 asked women to ask men how often they think about the Roman Empire. Women were shocked that men think about the Roman empire so often. I think men think about it so often because it was an amazing, powerful empire. It gave the world so much. When we look back on it, we don’t understand how it ever fell. It was so powerful. It covered all aspects of life. It was on the cutting edge of everything. It was simply the best of the best. How did it every disappear? How did the Roman Empire fall?
I think we are seeing it firsthand now in both Europe and the United States. We are so full of ourselves that we have lost all common sense. Instead of striving to look at people as people, to find our similarities and focus on them instead of our differences, we now highlight our differences and minimize our similarities. We fill ourselves with hatred towards those that are different. We allow babies to be hostages. We allow women to be raped if it supports a cause. There is no right and wrong any longer. In the words of the Presidents of Penn, MIT, and Harvard, ‘it depends on the context’. It never depends on the context. Evil is bad. Period. You cannot justify evil. There is good and evil and there is a difference. The world is now attempting to justify evil. The world is ignoring the definitions of words like genocide and apartheid to make them into catch phrases that sound powerful and allows people who use them incorrectly to feel superior.
Rome fell for many reasons. The three most common reasons cited are corruption, the division of the empire, and invasion by Germanic tribes. We are filled with corruption in our world today and in our country. We are as divided as we have been since the civil war. All that is missing is the invasion. As we saw last week when a Hezbollah terrorist was caught with the intention to set off a bomb in NY, the invasion has begun.
Can the fall of the United States be that far away? Will future generations study us and the Roman empire and see the pattern and do better? Do we have a chance to save our country and our world? I don’t know but I get less optimistic each day as we sink further and further into the abyss of hate, divisiveness, and stupidity.
May the hostages come home safely and soon. May the war in Gaza end soon with the surrender of Hamas. May we wake up from this bizzaro world and return to one of sanity where, in the words of the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.:
“I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.”
The great Dr. King. We need him now more than ever.
Right now, our nation and the world is getting a failing grade on the content of our character. And I fear for our future.
It’s Sunday so time to let music be my inspiration. This week it’s a song by Luke Bryan from 2017 titled, “Most People are Good”. It’s an interesting choice since not long ago, inspired by Anne Frank, I was talking about how there aren’t enough good people in the world. I’m honestly not sure if there aren’t enough good people or if they are just quiet and do good, or if the media just chooses to only focus on the bad. Perhaps it’s a combination of all three.
The lyrics are insightful and thoughtful.
I believe kids oughta stay kids as long as they can. Turn off the screen, go climb a tree, get dirt on their hands.
We live in a world where kids grow up way to fast. I think back to my childhood where we played outside every day. People had part time jobs for pocket money not as a primary goal nor to further our future careers. We played multiple sports and had diverse groups of friends. There was no such thing as “travel ball.” My mom would make us take off not just our shoes but our dirty clothes in the garage before entering the house. Times were simpler. The only screens were TVs and VCRs were fairly new so you could try to tape a show if you missed it but our lives were not dominated by TV, the internet (didn’t exist), streaming services, etc. We stayed kids as long as we could and that wasn’t a bad thing. When I look at how my kids and their friends grew up compared how I grew up, it’s truly a different world. We walked or road our bikes everywhere. Our parents didn’t know where we were every moment of every day through tracking software on cellphones or texting. Life was simpler. I have done what I can to provide that for my children. We have never tracked their location on their cellphones. We encourage them to stay kids as long as they can because adulting is both hard and long. Childhood is meant to be cherished and in today’s world, it’s now rushed through. I worry about our future when kids aren’t allowed and encouraged to be kids.
I believe we gotta forgive and make amends. ‘Cause nobody gets chance to make new old friends.
I consider myself lucky, in part because I have so many friends for more than 30 years. Some are more than 40 years and others more than 50. People who I grew up with. People who I have known most of my life. Like the song says, you can’t make new, old friends. Many years ago, I learned to ask a very important question. Would I rather be happy, or right? Most of the time, I’d rather be happy and choose actions that provide happiness. By choosing to be happy, I forgive and make amends. My friends stay my friends and we get through the challenges that all friendships and relationships have. Just this week I was talking to a friend from middle school and a friend from high school. I am getting together with a high school friend today because she is in town. These relationships are precious. They span decades and go back to a simpler time with cherished memories. In today’s world, we often let disagreements end friendships. Life is too short. Time is too precious. What do I gain from ending friendships that have lasted decades over unimportant things? I like that my children know my old friends. I like that they tell my children stories from ‘the old days’, even when they are embarrassing and especially when they are funny. Here are just a few pictures of a few of them.
I just got to spend time with Jim, Ananda, and Anna Marie at our friend Jeremy’s wedding. It has been years for some of us yet it felt like no time had passed.
My friend Aric who tells my kids classic stories they often don’t believe. We became friends in 1988 and are like brothers.
My friend Todd who has great stories to tell my kids, also ones they don’t believe. We became friends in 1987 and talk at least once a week.
My dear friend Ron – we have experienced the ups and downs of life together for the past 30+ years.
Larry and I met in either 1984 or 1985. We still talk every week.
Jamal and I have been friends for 20 years. He always inspires me and I am humbled when he says the same about me.
Darryl and I have been friends since 6th grade. He is now a mentor to my son Evan. Who wants to try to make new, old friends when you have old friends like this?
I read a very interesting article about two friends in Israel who allowed their political differences to impact their friendship. The impact of October 7th made them realize how important their friendship is and their disagreements politically aren’t a reason to not be friends. That’s a real life example of this lyric.
I believe in workin’ hard for what you’ve got. Even if it doesn’t add up to a hell of a lot.
My grandparents and parents taught me early in life the importance of hard work. They would often say that hard work is its own reward. As a kid, this was hard to understand. Hard work was to get a result. It was to obtain things. How could hard work be its own reward?
As I got older, I began to understand what they were talking about. It is about having a work ethic. It is about having values and living up to them. It is having integrity and working hard because it is the right thing to do, not because you will get a specific outcome.
The older I have gotten, the more I appreciate the things I have. Growing up and into my 30s it was all about more, more, more. The bigger house. The nicer car. More toys. The newest technology. Today I am grateful for what I have and often time realize that I would be just as happy, if not happier, if I had less. There is value in appreciating what you have and not wanting more all the time.
There is also another hidden message in these lyrics. Often times we judge people based on appearance. Based on the car they drive, the clothes they wear. This line urges us to look at the person, not what or how much they have. It reminds me of quote by the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. in which he said, “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.” The color of their skin, the amount of money in their bank account, the type of car they drive, the clothes they wear – all have nothing to do with the content of their character. All have nothing to do with the type of person and human being they are. We need to pay attention to who people are based on their actions, not their bank account.
A brilliant quote from To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee. We see what we look for.
I believe most people are good and most mamas oughta qualify for sainthood.
This is the line that I struggle with. Not the second part but the first part. In today’s world, are most people good? Half the country hates the other half. The rise in antisemitism is frightening. We literally see Nazis in Central Florida every few weeks. Sometimes in uniform, usually waving a big Nazi flag and chanting horrible things with awful signs. In Nashville there was a Nazi march where people were chanting ‘Heil Hitler’. This is not the 1930s in Germany. This is 2024 in the United States. Crime is up. Instead of random acts of kindness, we see random acts of violence. The rape, murder, and kidnapping of Jews on October 7th is acceptable only because they are Jews. Calls for a ceasefire happen daily but these people don’t demand the release of the hostages, now in their 133rd day of captivity. Too many good people are silent. It seems that over the past few years the famous quote, “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” was everywhere being said by everybody. Yet after October 7th, these people went silent. It seems there are daily demonstrations of the evil of humanity. I look every day for signs that most people are good and yet most people fail the test every day.
This was yesterday, 2 miles from my house. The hatred is real.I never thought I’d see Nazi flags flying like this in my lifetime. This was February 17, 2024.The growth of antisemitism is real. February 17, 2024 in Winter Park, FL.
It is a reminder to me that I can’t control anybody else. I am only responsible for myself. I can choose to be good. I can do my part to make the world a better place. I can choose to engage in random acts of kindness. I can choose to fight against all hatred and stand up and speak out. I can be an example and live true to my values. Perhaps if we each take responsibility for ourselves, we will end up with most people being good. At the end of the day, I’m not responsible for most people. I am responsible for myself.
I love the line about most mamas qualifying for sainthood. Being a parent is difficult and as I have watched my mom, my mother-in-law, and my wife, I see how much more difficult it is to be a mom. I don’t know if it is societal expectations and training or something innate, but the differences between being a mom and a dad are significant. I am ok with my children struggling – it’s part of life and learning important life lessons. My wife wants to protect them from any struggles, it’s in her DNA as a mom. We both love our children and want only the best for them. We talked about this last night, and I was fascinated by the difference in our points of view. So I agree with Luke Bryan – most mamas should be Saint Mama.
I believe most Friday nights look better under neon or stadium lights.
As the parent of a high school football player, there was not much better than Friday Night Lights and watching my son play each week. It was an incredible four years and six years after it ended, I still miss it.
I can dig deeper into this lyric and go beyond high school football. Growing up, Friday night meant Shabbat dinner. It didn’t matter what I wanted to do before or after, we sat down as a family, often with guests, for Shabbat dinner. My mom would light Shabbat candles, my dad would typically make kiddush, and one of the kids would say the Motzi. No matter what, we were together as a family for Shabbat dinner. When my son played high school football, that became our Shabbat dinner – together as a family, under the stadium lights, usually eating a hot dog or hamburger for dinner, and loving every minute of being together.
Friday night, Shabbat, gives me the opportunity to set aside the business of the week and focus on the things that are really important. Family. Friends. Spirituality. Health. Just like Friday Night Lights creates a special environment, Shabbat itself creates that opportunity, if we are willing to take it. I fully admit that I am not a traditionally shomer shabbat person. I do use Shabbat as a break from the week. It’s the day that I get to refocus and recenter. It’s the day I focus more intensely on family. As a family of college football fanatics, Shabbat has been a traditional day where all four of us sit together all day watching college football. When the kids were little, we all climbed into our bed. Now that they are bigger than me, we watch in the living room. It’s become a family tradition that is a break from the rest of the week.
Friday night looks better under the neon or stadium lights because of the uniqueness they offer. Friday night also looks better because of the uniqueness of Shabbat and the opportunity to, for one day, set aside the stress of the real world and focus instead on the smaller, more intimate world of family and friends.
I believe you love who you love. Ain’t nothing you should ever be ashamed of.
It makes me so happy that a country singer wrote these words and sings it proudly. Country music and fans of country music are often categorized as racist and homophobic. To have a major country music star make this type of statement helps improve the world. It says loud and clear that people are people. Who you love is your business and nobody else’s. And there is nothing wrong with loving whoever it is that you love.
Growing up, we had a tight group of friends that all went to Hebrew School together. Most of us also went to the same public schools. We remain close today and have a Facebook messenger chat group to keep in touch. I remember when two members of our tightknit group came out. It wasn’t a surprise to any of us. We had known for years and years. It didn’t matter because we love everybody in the group for who they are. We celebrate all the diversity of our friends because of who they are.
My confirmation class – we stay in touch 40 years later.
In a song about most people being good, this line is so important. Hate is simply unacceptable yet continues to grow in our world. It doesn’t matter who the hate is targeting. It can be the African American community, the LGBTQ+ community, the Asian community, the Muslim community, the Jewish community – hate is hate is hate. We must stand together against all hate because those who live in hate will simply move their hatred from group to group. Our power comes from standing together and strongly condemning all hate. Not allowing it to fester and grow. Hate is taught which means we can teach love instead of hate. Just like Luke Bryan, I believe you love who you love and there is nothing to be ashamed of. You are who you are and there is nothing to be ashamed of. If we want to live in a world driven by love instead of hate, we accept people for who they are and appreciate all the differences each of us bring to our community and to the world.
I believe this world ain’t half as bad as it looks. I believe most people are good.
Despite some of my struggles with most people being good, I find this line inspirational. Perhaps it is because he says it ‘ain’t half as bad as it looks’, recognizing that the world looks pretty bad today. So much of why the world looks bad is because of what the media shows us. The saying, “If it bleeds, it leads” has become more than the truth, it seems it is now the mantra for the media. We get shown the worst of humanity most of the time. We live in our own bubbles where we don’t interact enough with people who are different from us. We don’t celebrate our diversity and we don’t bother to try to understand others, instead we try to get them to agree with us.
In 2019 I had the gift of participating on the Encounter Immersive Program. This is a program that takes Jewish leaders to meet with leaders of Palestinian civil society for four days. I remember thinking that four days seemed awful short. After day 3, I was grateful it was only four days. The tagline for Encounter is “Listen, Learn, Lead.” And the program is really all about listening. It’s about understanding a different point of view and perspective. It’s not about trying to convince anybody of my beliefs but rather a chance for me to learn about their beliefs, their narrative, their story. It was a truly fascinating experience that I wrote about earlier in this blog – you can find the many posts I wrote near the beginning of this site. By listening, learning, and asking clarifying questions, I got a better understanding of the challenges in the region. It wasn’t just the simple good vs. evil or mine vs. yours. It gave me a chance to dig into challenges that have reframed by understanding. It only strengthened my Zionism while also increasing my humanity and building bridges.
If we can get beyond the surface answers and really spend time communicating – listening and learning – there is hope for the future. Not just in Israel but in the United States and around the world. There is so much clickbait and so many people only read the headlines without really understanding the details that it is easy to lose hope and only see the negative. I truly believe that most of us want the same things, it is more about how we get there and how we find was to talk about it that are the key. I think often of the stories of President Ronald Reagan and Speaker of the House, Tip O’Neill. They would spend all day arguing policy and at the end of the day, they would go out together and get a beer. How do we get back to the days when we focused on our similarities, not our differences?
So maybe the world really isn’t half as bad as it looks. We can certainly hope and do our part, since it looks pretty awful right now.
I believe them streets of gold are worth the work. But I’d still wanna go even if they were paved in dirt.
My parents taught us all that results aren’t promised. We can only do our part and put in the work. That’s what they asked of us – put in the work. I remember being happy in school getting an A- without any work and my parents being very upset. I didn’t understand. I remember working hard and only getting a B and they were happy and supportive. That confused me as well – wasn’t the A- better than the B? It took me a long time to understand that the value was in the work, not the result.
As I got older and began to understand the importance of the work itself, I began to learn things like not having control of the results. I can only do the work and put things in place for a likelihood of success. There are too many other factors to make it my responsibility for the outcome. The wisdom of Benjamin Franklin spoke to me when said, “If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail”. One of my mentors, Rabbi Mark Kram, was famous for saying “Failure to plan on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.”
Over the past years as I began to learn with a Rabbi, these thinking was reinforced again. I have learned with many Rabbis and educators. One common theme has been and continues to be that everything comes from God. Our job is to the work, not determine the results. Recently I was having dinner with my friend Harry Rothenberg, an attorney who is perhaps the best Jewish educator I have ever experienced. I watch his video blog every week and learn something meaningful each time. We were talking about how he had been stuck in terrible traffic and was going to be late to an event. He didn’t have a chance to eat lunch and there was a great cocktail reception before the event with delicious food. He was incredibly hungry and was going to miss the chance to eat. He was getting frustrated. He managed to make it to the event just as they were finishing clearing up the last of the food. Disappointed and hungry, he sat down for the event. At that time, he realized that the entire plan was one from God. He made the event on time. He arrived safely. Sure he missed the food but he wasn’t going to starve. He just missed the food. In the meantime, he had missed the bigger picture of everything being God’s plan. He realized he needed to do better.
Harry and me after dinner and a great learning session. I love having him as a friend and teacher.
I was inspired by the story for two reasons. First, if you are like me, you tend to get caught up in what is happening that minute and can lose sight of the big picture. I can get upset because traffic means I will be late. The person in front of me is driving slowly. I didn’t get to eat lunch and am hungry. All sorts of details that are happening right at that time but don’t really matter. I lose the big picture that I I will arrive where I need to get safely. That patience is a virtue. That I won’t starve and have plenty of food, just not at that minute. When I focus on the big picture, I get filled with gratitude. Even if the roads are paved in dirt, they feel like they are paved in gold.
The second part of inspiration is the desire to do better. There is always an opportunity to improve, to do a little more, to be a little better. My spiritual advisor, Mickey Singer, would often guide me that life is a journey to be experienced. We are here as a spiritual being, having a human experience, so experience it. Realizing that we can improve, that we can be better, and doing the work required to do better really does make those dirt roads into gold.
I believe that youth is spent well on the young. ‘Cause wisdom in your teens would be a lot less fun.
How many times have any of us said, “If I only knew then what I know now…”? Would we really want to know then what we know now? As a 16-year-old, would I really know and be able to follow through on things that took me 40 years to learn? Would that knowledge ruin the childhood that I talked about above? Would I be any better off knowing it then but not having the capacity or ability to really take advantage of it?
Youth is for the young. Our bodies are able to do more. We have more energy and the lessons of the world have not been learned yet. As somebody who grew up in the 70s and 80s, I look back with fond memories. Not because I want to be who I was back then but because of who I was back then. It was the only time in my life that I could be that person. That I could have the freedom offered to the young. No physical restriction. No limitations because of the responsibilities of a wife and children. No career to be concerned about.
I think about friends who didn’t have the luxury of youth when they were young. Financial insecurity. Issues with permanent housing. Unstable home life situations. They were forced to grow up quickly and had far more wisdom at 16 or 20 than I did. It comes at a cost. I think of the children impacted by the war with Israel and Hamas. They have far too much life wisdom now. How many of them would trade all of this wisdom to go back to an October 6th world?
We live in such a fast-paced world now that kids don’t get a chance to be kids. There is academic pressure that begins at an insanely early age. I remember a few years ago talking to parents about their 2-year-old child in our preschool. The child’s grandfather had already called Harvard about getting him on a wait list. Let me repeat, the child was 2 YEARS OLD! I think about the IB and AP courses my children took in high school and the academic pressure they faced. In hindsight was it really worth it? When I talk with them the answer is no – both would have been much happier doing a dual enrollment program or even taking regular coursework.
Youth is for the young. Let’s not steal it from them by trying to get them somewhere before they need to be there.
I believe if you just go by the nightly news, your faith in all mankind would be first thing you lose.
I stopped watching the nightly news a number of years ago. Everything was negative and the national news was focused entirely on their own spin. There is a reason there is no longer a news department and these programs are in the entertainment division. It is far too easy to find a news channel that will reinforce your own beliefs or will make you hate those with different views.
For a while I watched the CBS Sunday morning show because they only told happy and inspiring stories. It made me realize that there are plenty of these stories available if you look for them. We don’t have to be consumed with the negativity and lose our faith in mankind. We can find the stories that inspire us. That give us hope. One news site I follow does a story every Sunday where they allow a reader to tell a story of gratitude where they get to highlight the kindness somebody else did for them. It’s one of my favorite things to read because it reinforces faith in mankind.
The nightly news can be toxic. On October 7th, my friend the Consul General of Israel to Florida, told me to stop watching the news. It wasn’t healthy to be so focused and so obsessed on the murder, rape, and kidnapping of Jews by Hamas. I understood but also couldn’t stop. When I watched the Hamas video of October 7th, many people asked why I would want to see that inhumanity and put myself through it. I told them I needed to bear witness. We have to be careful with what we consume as it shapes our reality. I spend time talking with friends of mine in Israel, with friends who have had family members taken hostage – some have been released and some are still hostages. I talk with people who are actively looking to change the world through their actions. Medical research. Summer camp for children. People working with victims of terror to attempt to restore humanity. Mentoring and coaching youth who need the guidance and support to have a better future. Those working with pediatric hospitalized patients and seniors struggling with loneliness. People focused on finding the light in the world amidst the darkness.
We can find our faith in mankind restored when we choose to see the beauty happening all around us and make an active choice to join in that beauty.
I believe that days go slow, and years go fast. And every breath’s a gift, the first one to the last.
As a kid, the days went slow, and the years seemed to go slower. There was always something to look forward to. Turning 10 and being double digits. 13 was Bar Mitzvah. 16 was my driver’s license. Graduating high school and going off to college. 18 was voting. 21 the legal drinking age. Graduating college. Focusing on the milestones, time seemed to drag on as the next one was always so significant and exciting. I remember when my oldest son was born and being told that now the days will go slow, but the years will go fast. How true that statement became. It seems like yesterday my sons were in preschool, taking naps, and I was reading them bedtime stories as we cuddled, never certain who fell asleep first, them or me. Precious days and precious times. My wife commented to me the other day how much she misses my older son who is now in Tennessee starting his career. My youngest is still at home and we treasure the time because it goes too fast. In a few months he will be a senior in college, and we will prepare for the next big change in our lives.
I turned 56 in December. I still feel like I am in my 30s most days and there are times I feel like I’m back in high school. Yet 60 is around the corner. I remember when my Uncle Joe died at 50 years old thinking, “at least he lived a good long life.” I was 21 – what did I know? As a kid, filled with youth and being young, time was plentiful and abundant. Now it is the most precious commodity in the world. We only get so much of it and then it is gone forever.
I first experienced this when my cousin Eric died in 1995 at the age of 27. We grew up together and were like brothers. My childhood is filled with stories of Eric and me. One day he was here, vibrant, alive, with an incredible future. Then he was gone. I was blessed to know two of my great grandparents, all four of my grandparents, all four of my wife’s grandparents, and have great relationships with my parents and my in-laws. My great-grandparents and all eight of the grandparents are now gone. I treasure the time with them and appreciate all that I got. My dad died in September 2022, and I miss him every day. My cousin Todd, Eric’s younger brother, died tragically in 2015. After Eric’s death, he became another little brother to me, and we had many long and deep conversations. I had spoken with him a few days before he died. Every breath truly is a gift, the first to the last. And we are never promised the next one.
Its still hard to believe it has been almost 30 years since Eric died
I can’t beieve it’s 8 1/2 years since Todd died.
Over the last two years I had a number of health issues. I was still in the youth mindset of living forever and being indestructible, despite the clear signals that wasn’t true. My dad dying was the point where I knew I had to make changes. I lost weight, got in better shape, and tried to put better boundaries in my life. Work life balance became much more important as I realized that I had taken more breaths in my past than I would in my future. As these changes took hold and required significant life alterations, it really hit home when my mom said to me, “I was waiting for the call telling me you had a heart attack.” That statement shook me to the core and still does today. I’ve chosen to live my life differently as a result. Each breath we get is truly precious, from the first to the last. Why would want to waste a single one?
Who would have thought that a simple country music song would inspire a 5,000-word essay? I guess the need for believing that most people are good is really that important. The world we live in is so fraught with challenges that a simple believe in the goodness of people is essential and a given. Let’s join together to change that.
On Sunday Jan 14, 2024, it will officially be 100 days since the violent attacks by Hamas resulting in the murder, mutilation, rape, burning, and kidnapping of Israelis. There remain 132 people held hostage by Hamas in Gaza including infants, toddlers, children, women, and the elderly. They have not been provided their medication in 100 days. They have been held in underground tunnels for 100 days. Birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays have come and gone while they are being held captive. For the past hundred days the attacks on October 7th, the murders, mutilation, rape, burning, and kidnapping of my Jewish and non-Jewish brothers and sisters just because they were in Israel has weighed heavy on me.
I ordered a new Magen David (Star of David) from Israel that I wear. I got two dogtags from Israel, one saying “Bring them Home Now” in English and Hebrew, the other quoting released hostage Mia Schem, taken from the Nova music festival, and her tattoo, boldly stating, “We will dance again.” I want to fly an Israeli flag at my house, however due to the rise in antisemitism and the fears of my family, I don’t.
This rise in antisemitism has fueled my anger and rage. Seeing what’s happening on campus and watching and listening to then President of The University of Pennsylvania, Liz Magill, then President of Harvard College, Claudine Gay, and President of MIT, Sally Kornbluth refuse to state that calls for the genocide of Jews would violate their University’s code of contact was infuriating and unbelievable.
Watching some members of the US House of Representatives who previously stood strongly against sexual violence keep silent because the victims were Jews burns in my gut. People shamelessly throwing around words like ‘ethnic cleansing’ and ‘genocide’ without knowing the definition or the proper application has fire in my eyes. When South Africa has the nerve to charge Israel with genocide at the International Criminal Court my body cramped and ached with exhaustion. Israel, and the Jewish people, are being singled out compared to every other group or nation and excluded from protection.
When Germany, of all nations, comes out with a strong statement in support of Israel, clearly stating they are not involved in genocide, it provides relief. When Canada stands up and says that while they believe in the process of the International Criminal Court, it “does not mean we support the premise of the case brought forward by South Africa.” it is both surprising because of recent events in Canada and relief that they are doing what’s right. When the U.K. calls these claims “unjustified’ it generates major news. The United States has called these claims ‘unfounded’. It took watching and listening to Dr. Tal Becker’s incredible opening statement, 30 minutes of powerful and clear statements, to truly provide me with some relief.
This is not the way I lived my life prior to October 7, 2023. It’s not how I want to live my life today. Yet the realities of what occurred on October 7th and what has happened since, have me struggling on a daily basis. I was talking with a friend on Friday over coffee who saw the 47-minute Hamas video with me about the experience. She commented on how she hasn’t been able to process it with anybody because they can’t imagine the horrors she witnessed. And how some of the images will never leave her memory. I feel the same way and some of the images that have deeply disturbed her are the same that deeply disturb me.
So how do I move forward? How do I find inspiration and hope in a world that continues to suck hope and joy out with such incredible hate. How do I get past these feelings when I already know where I will go and who will hide me and my family if that time should ever come? How do I come to accept that not only have I had that thought but spoken to that person who agreed to do it? That in 2024, in the United States of America, I feel so unsafe that I need to have a secure place to hide. That the hatred of Jews is so strong and accepted that people feel safe screaming it from the top of lungs in public settings.
I have found inspiration in three places. The first is the Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr. A true leader in times when the African American community was facing the same type of public hatred, he remained a beacon of light. Nearly 56 years after his assassination, his words, spirit, and leadership remain powerful. How fitting is that as I write this, it is the weekend celebrating his birth. Dr. King has many famous quotes that are filled with inspiration. So many inspired me. I picked 5 that speak to me now.
Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.
We must walk on in the days ahead with an audacious faith in the future.
Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.
I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.
Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it.
You will notice that 3 of the 5 relate to love instead of hatred. It’s easy to be filled with hate after October 7th and the 100 days the hostages have been kept. It’s easy to hate when the Red Cross refuses to see the hostages or get them medicine. It’s easy to hate after watching the 47-minute Hamas video. Yet hatred, as Dr. King states, is a burden, paralyzes, confuses, and darkens life. As I struggle with my anger and rage, Dr. King inspires me to be better and to do better. He reminds me that those who are sincerely ignorant and consciously stupid are dangerous and I have an obligation to continue to learn and to educate others. And most importantly, he reminds me that I must have faith in the future and focus on love, not hate.
The second may be seen by some as controversial. Joe Paterno was more than a football coach. The investment he put into his players as people is legendary. I know so many people who weren’t players who had interactions with him and his focus was always about being better people. What type of person do you want to be? What type of parent? Spouse? I have friends who played on his teams and they all talk about how he invested in them as people. Due to the Sandusky scandal, the statue of him was removed. Penn State fans want it back and recently I read something about it once again. The thought came to me that were he still alive, the statue wouldn’t be something he cared about. But the type of people he coached and how they live their lives today is something he’d care about. One of my middle and high school friends who was on the team from 1985-1990 is a great example. Darryl is also in coaching and has been a mentor to my son Evan. Along with being a friend to me, he is always available to help Evan. I have seen the way he interacts with the players he coaches and like Joe Paterno, he cares about them as people first. As I struggle with the feelings since October 7th, I think of the lessons from Coach Paterno and how that relates. “Success with honor” was one of key goals for Coach Paterno. It’s also how the IDF behaves. They have their mission however they go above and beyond to what they can to ensure civilians aren’t harmed. Unfortunately, Hamas does everything they can to ensure that civilians are harmed. Coach Paterno had to compete against those who cheated. Israel has to fight against Hamas who uses hospitals, schools, mosques, and homes as military bases. Yet neither Coach Paterno nor the IDF compromise their values even when it makes things more difficult.
The third place I find my inspiration is from my father. I had a very close relationship with my father and when he died in September 2022, it had a huge impact on me. My dad always focused on what you do, not what you say. He focused on family and how important it is. He cared about people and was always there as a resource to anybody and everybody. As I struggle with these feelings, I often hear my dad in my head, giving me advice and guidance. I have wanted to go to Israel since October 7th but my family is too concerned about safety and doesn’t want me to go. I hear my dad telling me that as much as I want to go, as much as I need to go for myself, nothing is more important than family. I know he would tell me to do what I can from here and be grateful that I can do things from here, even if it isn’t what I would prefer to do. As I struggle with the anger and rage, he would tell me to focus on the beauty in my life, my family, my friends, and appreciate what I have rather than be consumed with anger and hate. Like Dr. King, my dad focused on love and light. I miss him terribly but even now, he is helping me deal with these feelings.
My brother, my dad, and me. He was my mentor and idol and he continues to teach me every day.
Today was the Ride for Israel in town. Some wonderful community members put it together and a large crowd showed up for motorcycle and cars driving with Israeli flags, signs, and more throughout Orlando. For two hours we drove all around town as people honked in support. We had a great crowd and it felt good to be together as a community in support of Israel and the Kibbutzim that were attacked on October 7th. It was a day of love, hope, community, friendship and fun. As I struggle with the feelings post October 7th, it’s things like this along with the inspiration from Dr. King, Joe Paterno, and my dad that get me through it.
Leaders of the Ride for Israel. What an incredible day.
I do believe and have hope for the future. And perhaps that hope is what will get me through these challenging days.
Over the past 25 years, I have attended the AIPAC Policy Conference many times. Having the opportunity to listen to incredible speakers, attend great breakout sessions, and lobby on Capitol Hill always made it a highlight.
I have great memories of taking 40+ students from The University of Florida to the conference year after year. Meeting with key Florida politicians and influential leaders for photos. Our Saturday night dinner in Chinatown became legendary and the donor who underwrote it would fly up for the dinner and not stay for the conference, just to interact with the students. I met my friend and teacher, Dr. Ken Stein, at AIPAC Policy Conference after attending his sessions and being blown away with the information he presented. That is now close to a 20-year friendship.
Perhaps the most important thing that I learned at the AIPAC Policy Conference came in 2009, when the theme was “Relationships Matter”. I met my friend Reverend Ken Flowers at that conference. I was named one of AIPAC’s Campus Allies at that conference. Neither of them were the most important thing at that conference. The topic, “Relationships Matter” was the most important thing from that conference.
That was a transformational moment for me as I began to understand the need to build relationships across all levels. People of different religions, cultures, political beliefs, etc. What hit me strongly was that in order to be successful we needed to bridge divides, have real relationships with people, and get involved BEFORE you asked for anything in return. In a country and a world which was already transactional and one that has since become even more transactional, these real relationships matter. They are what change the world.
Over the past 14 years, that is what I have strived to do. I have relationships with political leaders of both major parties. Friendships with these people. I reach out because of the relationship, not because I want or need anything. And they reach out as well. I love getting a Hanukkah card from the White House, regardless of who is the President. When my Senator sends me a little handwritten note about something, it has special meaning. When my member of the US House of Representatives texts me a note or a question, it is part of real relationship. When members of the Florida House of Representatives text or we talk, it is not because I’m trying to get them to vote a certain way but rather because we engage in old fashioned conversation.
I have friends who are leaders in the Christian and Muslim community. Leaders in African-American community and the LBGTQ+ community. I have friends who are Arabs and Christians living in East Jerusalem, Bethlehem, and Nablus. I have spent time talking and learning from people who were raised to hate Jews and joined violent organizations that attacked Jews, some of them even murdered Jews in Israel, before undergoing a transformation and striving to learn and build relationships with people they never even considered people. I’ve previously written about one of them, Ali Abu Awaad, who inspires me regularly with his work towards Palestinian non-violence and finding a new way to build a different relationship with Israel that can lead to a long lasting peace.
Early this morning I got a message from my friend who is a leader in the local Muslim community. We became friends a few years ago and have done some volunteer work together. I have visited his mosque a number of times and feel comfortable there. He has gone through some personal challenges recently and I regularly check on him. His current volunteer work needs some help and so, as his friend, I am helping. His note this morning was:
Good Morning Keith. I am at the mosque for the morning prayer and I remembered you. I will
say a prayer for you. Stay blessed.
Thought of the day
“Love is the devotion to the well-being of others without regard to the cost.”
My heart filled with joy as I read it because my friend not only thought of me on a random Saturday morning but was moved to include me in his prayers and share a little wisdom.
My friends are like a bag of skittles – all colors, flavors, and types. The commonality they all have is the type of person that they are. As the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. famously said:
“I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.”
That’s how I pick my friends. The content of their character. That is how I invest in relationships. The content of their character. That’s how people inspire me. The content of their character.
Recently I have been surprised and inspired by the words of a major public figure. It usually takes a lot to surprise me, but US Senator John Fetterman has done so. I was not impressed when he ran for Senate. For the first part of his term, I only saw somebody who appeared to be hanging around, almost mocking what it mean to be a US Senator. In the aftermath of October 7th, I realize how wrong I was and how I was not judging him by the content of his character but rather the image that was presented. Senator Fetterman has spoken out powerfully and clearly about the terrorist group Hamas. He speaks out regularly about the need for all the hostages taken by Hamas to be released. He hung the pictures of all the hostages in his office. He doesn’t celebrate the violence and terror of October 7th nor does he celebrate the horrors of the war since then. He doesn’t demand a cease-fire that will accomplish nothing but more future terror and death but speaks the truth – if Hamas returns all the hostages and surrenders, there will be a cease fire. But not before. He is taking major criticism from many in his party because of this yet he continues to hold true to his values. He is truly showing us the content of his character.
In today’s crazy world where it is easy to judge somebody by the 10 second clip they play on the news (often out of context) or the way a certain news channel may present them, or how a journalist chooses to frame a story, Senator Fetterman has reminded me that relationships matter. That getting to know people before judging them matters. That investing time and energy into a relationship, whether your world views agree or collide, is beneficial and important.
As I begin my new career arc, I often get asked what’s my favorite part of the work. My answer is consistent. I get to work with people that I like and respect. I get to help people accomplish their goals and the goals for their organization. I get to work for clients that I want to work for, and we get to build a relationship together. I choose to not have them be transactional relationships but something deeper. It’s meaningful. And isn’t that what life is all about? Finding meaning? That theme in 2009 was so accurate. Relationships Matter.
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